Ugh, I haven't posted in forever and two weeks! So annoying! I never get to!
Yesterday we went to Sungmin's friends's house. (The mom and dad are co-workers with mom, I think) It was horrible!!!
For one thing, they had this aunt visiting. Not much of an aunt, more like-
Ah, shiznit, fergit. I said that.
Anyways. She was REALLY annoying! At one point in the meal, I swear, she was sitting there smacking her lips, loudly, for no earthly reason whatsoever that I could see! Unless it was the fact that she had a very loud an obnoxious eight month old baby, and was therefore paying more attention to it than anything else, even though all she needed to do was let it sit there placidly on her lap. But no, what does she do? She riles up the kid, so it starts howling like an ambulance. Then, we have no choice but to watch her spoon disgusting orange goop into its wide open and waiting mouth. Very gross. Very gross indeed. Then, when I tried to introduce myself, she looked at me, did a half smile, and turned back to Baby Ickypoo. What a rude woman, no?
Of course, the dad is also highly irritating. He may also be a perv. I'm not yet sure.
The mom is pretty nice, though, although after I thanked her for the meal, she repeated my sentence to the other adults in an amused tone. Seriously. Woulda thought they'd be more polite, it being Sabbath and all.
Oh yeah! I found this gorgeouso eyeshadow at Clarks (the health food store)!! It's called Opal Irridecsence (or something like that) and looks like powder foundation until you put it on, and then it turns this gorgeous iridescent lavenderish white with sparkles that look really pretty in your eyelashes. It's so gorgeous! I really want some, but, knowing Clarks, it's probably 10.99 for a bottle big enough for two applications. (Yeah, I know, that's more than twice my weekly salary, so shut up! I'm still a kid, so I can't expect to get paid a lot!) (Or wait, can't you work when you're fourteen? NOOOO! I don't WANNA!!!! Boo!)
Now where was I?
Get the heck offa me, Banana!
I hate those lovebirds.
(that sounds funny, does it not?)
During church today, I went up to find a seat with Zac and Kitty. Alas, everywhere we looked, it was full. We wandered around for awhile, until we spotted a mysteriously empty pew, sitting all by itself in the middle of the balcony. So, naturally, we sat down. Unfortunately, after we had been sitting there for awhile, I realized why it had been empty. Next to us, on one end, were two gay ladies who kept hugging each other and holding hands (they were rather old, too, at least forty, which is SUPREMELY disgusting, if you ask me) and behind us was an impossibly loud and disgusting family, who included
1. a grandma who was chewing gum so loudly you could hear her from five pews away
2. a little boy with a cold who seemed to find it nessecary to smack his lips loudly and in random places, and who also wouldn't stop blowing his nose
3. a mom, who seemed to think it was polite to make sure everyone was aware she was eating candy the whole time (I'm not sure, but I think she may have even drooled some into my hair), and
4. a creepy dad/grandpa with the most DISGUSTING fingernails I've ever seen! At least he wasn't smacking his lips too.
Really, I should be more tolerant of the gross eaters among us, but for some reason, I really can't. It's my pet peeve. So in yo face. Unfortunately, I'm constantly plagued with it, because all members of my family are of the Gross Eating variety, which makes mealtimes painful for me. I mean, Kitty even slurps her milk with every drink she takes! Sungmin wips his hands on his clothes, hair, plate, brother, and anything else he can get them on. Mom smacks her lips so loud it sounds like an airplane is flying overhead, and everyone else is just as bad. Really, what's a girl to do? I've considered making a little box, putting earplugs in it, and sticking it to a wall with a sign that says "get your earplugs for dinner here", and I think I really may do that sometime if they don't improve. Also, I thought of xeroxing that old Mrs. Pigglewiggle story about the bad table manners cure and putting them on everyone's plates, or maybe writing an adress to a manners school on the blackboard where everyone is sure to see it, but I'm not sure this would work. However, I'mma do it anyway, because you can't know until you try!
I will use little ways to improve them.... because it sure as f*ck ain't working to try to get them to emulate me!
Jade is pissed that we're gonna have to miss her birthday party. I can't say I am, though. Cause, if you had a choice, would you rather get dissed by His Majesty The Queen and The Wicked Bitch Of The West or... wait, I have to miss it to go to orchestra. Crud. No, crud isn't strong enough. Darn. Nah, still too weak. Shit. No, shit isn't strong enough either.
FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok, that does it. (actually, it doesn't, but let's leave it at that, before i get expelled from the blogosphere) Why do I have to continually hang out with people who would be happier if I met my own timely demise? (timely for them not me) I mean, I'd rather jump headfirst into a pit of cock-odiles and ali-gay-tors than hang out with Ilene and TiTi! (And Mr. Sister) I'd rather chew up five dicks than go to school with all of them! I'd rather sit bare-assed on a pile of dog poo than have to spend all day with anybody like that! I'd rather- well, I better stop, as this is getting muy muy disgusting. But you get my drift. I hate spending time with people like that, just as much as they hate spending time with me! You see?
Darn it, I'm hungry.
Unforch, I can't eat anything, cause, since I'm fat, I decided an extreme diet would be best. (extreme for me. For other people, it would be very light indeed) Ugh, how did I get so fat? Everyone else in the family is stick-skinny! Except me. The perfect princess of plumpness. And I used to be so thin! Also, I used to have tiny hips and a very boyish figure! So, all in all, I guess I'm better off like this. I'm just an hourglass that holds more sand, ok? I'm not short OR fat! I'm just... er... economical. Yeah. Really, though, I'd like to stay short. Short and thin, but with big boobs and a nice round butt. That would be perfecto. Buuuuuuuut, I have to be fat. Perfectly fat. Delight. That must be why Roman found his darling Crystal Clay. Jade said she met her, and she was, in quotes, "really nice and pretty". My opposite, huh? Great. I thought fo shizzle I could get someone, but I'm probably wrong. Who likes a whale? (Other than marine biologists, that is, who are impractical since they're presumably quite a few years older than me.) Now I'm jealous of Rukia and Ichigo, because they're together (probably). Nice. I'm jealous of an anime couple. But, seriously! I wish I weren't so friggin fat! If I were thinner or prettier, Roman might have taken notice of me! Although, that is a bit superficial. But still. We're living in the age of materialism. (Isn't it a bad thing to think of yourself as material?) I'm not that fat, am I? I mean, I don't look like Nicki Blonski or anything, but I'm still a bit chubby. Zac tried to say something about this, so I kicked him off the swing (we were at the park). He didn't like it much, I'm afraid, but that's what you get when you let your heart win. Oh, wait, I mean when you insult a girl about her weight. Seriously, I typed that by accident. Paramore is da bomb!
And Hayley Williams isn't fat.
Ugh.
Fat.
So fat I'll probably get an arrythmia and die.
And then everyone will read my blog.
And laugh.
(when it's not appropriate)
And groan.
(when they're supposed to be laughing)
Seriously, kids, don't grow up to look like me. You'll regret it all your living days.
Darn it, I SO want a boyfriend! He can't be a dickhead, though. Eh, fine. He can be a dickhead. I already have such a big inferiority complex (minus the anger issues) that he couldn't inferiorate me any more than I already am. But, hmm. I would like my first kiss to be from a nice guy, because otherwise it seems too tragic. Unforch, there probably aren't any nice guys to be had, because CRYSTAL CLAY TOOK THE LAST ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DARN it! Seriously! Darn it! Darndarndarndarndarnddarndarndarn IT! CHA!
Now I do have anger issues.
Against perfect people.
And against imperfect me.
Perfect.
xoxoxo~♥~
No comments:
Post a Comment