Goodnight, demonslayer, goodnight.... *closes eyes dreamily and sways to music*
I love Voltaire! Squeal!
Oh mannnn..... Chatty The Chubby Chipmunk wants to go on a "date" and I really could do without him. But, ok. As long as he keeps his ginormous mouth closed. I mean, that thing is HUGE. It's like, the size of New York City mixed with S-hole's ego (and that thing is damn enormous!). Perchance I should sing him a heartfelt rendition of Trouty Mouth. "Troooouty mouttthhhhh... fishhyyyyy lipsssss.... is that how people's lips like.... where you come frooooommm.... in the South?" The only problem would be his probably negative reaction to this impromptu serenade. I mean, what if he decided to open up his immense gob and swallow me whole? I don't think I'd like that very much.
Well, there could be worse things, I suppose.
What, I'm not sure. But something.
Well.... it's that time of year! Tour is coming up on Thursday. Do you know how stressful this is for me? The fact that the group's failure will rest singlehandedly upon my shoulders unless some kind of miracle of amazing proportions occurs does not really do much to bolster my confidence. Also, the girl who is singing my solo is SUCH a bitch! She is the bitchiest bitch in bitchdom! And she's really not very pretty at all. And she's not too bright. And she sounds like a belching bullfrog singing Rebecca Black and dying of gastrointestinal distress when she sings. How the hell did she get the solo? And why the hell am I the understudy? It's not like I'm that great either. Although I'm sure I could do better than she (and I know this because I did, sight reading). Although, to be fair, anything would be an improvement over her soulful croaking.
And don't even get me started on her fashion sense! Damn, she looks like a prep. In fact, she IS a prep. That would explain it. She once wore this hideous flowered muumuu with triangles and squares and hexagons and geometrical formulas and who-knows-what-all in shades of brilliant orange, green, blue, black, purple, white, and puke. It was sooooo ugly! And to make it even uglier, she wore it with footless leggings (in black) and Toms.
Sexy shit. I friggin loathe men.
I swear, as long as I live, I will never grow up to be a man.
Wait....
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Friday, March 18, 2011
I sound like I'm from Jersey Shore.
I'm waiting for Sonia to get back from going out to eat with her family so we can go out somewhere. She totally misses me (and Allie). Of course, I miss them too.
Gah. Anna's party is tomorrow, and I swore I'd go (and give Allie a ride too) but I'm supposed to be going out with stupid f-ing Bradley at the same time! It's ridiculous! I much prefer Anna to Bradley, but I already agreed to.... wait, no, I told Anna in AP Euro a couple weeks ago that I'd go to her party. HELL YES! No more fuckin Bradley! Er. Not that I really would fuck him. He's hideous. And fat. And white. And therefore disgusting. But it's the principle of the thing.
Why do I get picked up by so many guys?
Weird.
Maybe the school is inhabited by chubby chasers.
By the way, I'm not cheating on JTJ because he hardly ever texts me or anything. The most romantic thing he did recently (besides kiss me) was sharing his math book with me during second period because I had "forgotten" mine. (The thing is damn heavy. No way I'm carrying that all over campus all day. Especially with Palmer. Not that I actually do carry Palmer, but...) So you see? He is not into me and I am, er, not into him. Yeah. That's right.
OH! Did I write about our lovely date? I must needs check.
I mentioned it, but I didn't write in detail.
*swoons*
Ok. Think I'm good now.
So, he picked me up at my house, right on time! Squee! I do so love that trait in others, as it so rarely is evidenced in myself! He was wearing his leather jacket, and da-a-a-a-a-a-amn, he looked fine! I just about passed out right there! Of course, I didn't look so bad either. I had on my little pencil skirt (which I am coincidentally wearing now), tights, my purple camisole top (attractively tight and low, but not so much as to look like Lucy The Slut), my denim jacket that makes me look like I'm in a gang whose emblems are rhinestones, and black flats. I even curled my hair! And I was only wearing lip gloss and eyeliner! I was being so modest, I felt like a nun. People were probably wondering why I was out of the convent. Anyway, so we went off (in his mom's car! LMFAO!) and I unfortunately had to meet his scary mom and brother. Why WAS his bro there anyway? Did he want to meet the pathetic girl who would date his fickle fraternal family member? Or did he just want to spot him some booty? He looked like he hadn't seen any (except for Link's from the Legend of Zelda) for years. Possibly decades. Or at least one decade. He didn't look very old. I think he was about thirteen. The mom was really nice, but scary. Probably because she was so nice. It was kind of freaking me out, I mean, usually I meet up with parents who will do anything to put you out of the spotlight, including (but not limited to) poison, hitmen, and transcribed music for Baby for string quartet and solo oboe. But this lady was all over me asking about my schedule, hair color, genealogy, mother's maiden name, and social security number. Maybe she wanted to impersonate me. Anyway, we got out, and went to market night. It was really fun, and it helped that people seemed to think we were a couple. KYAAHH! ♥ ♥ ♥ then we went to Gourmet Pizza and he bought food for me. TURN ON! (Not the food, the fact that he bought stuff for me) we talked about random stuff, and he's interesting! He's actually interesting! I could weep tears of blood and joy! HE'S FRIGGIN INTERESTING!!! So then we saw a movie, and he held my hand on the way over ♥ and then we went home. He walked me up to the door, and then kissed me! I didn't think he had the nerve, but he did, and it was friggin weird, because I actually liked it! Whenever I thought about it afterwards, I got that gooey feeling (not in THAT way! Fuck you!) and got all blushy and shit. Kind of embarrassing to admit, but I'm blushing even now writing this. It's like a month later, get a grip! Sexy shit. But then he texted Allie to tell her that he had fun (and I did too) and yeahh..... It's kind of weird. Allie has been like an agent for both of us, working behind the scenes. I feel bad for her. Also for Sonia. Like, for sure. When the guy you loved for months suddenly asks out your best friend without her lifting a finger, it's got to suck. Although I don't know. I've never been in that position. But I must speculate.
Actually, he's been talking to her more now that he's been talking to me.
Good, right? Or something.
HOLY HELL, I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING! Maybe he's doing it to get close to me!!!
*SLAP*
Jasmine, Jasmine, Jasmine. You are Le Idiot Extrémee if you actually believe that. Get that thought out of your brain.
Oh, ok, Sonia's home.
Gonna go hang out with her then.
Bye love.
Gah. Anna's party is tomorrow, and I swore I'd go (and give Allie a ride too) but I'm supposed to be going out with stupid f-ing Bradley at the same time! It's ridiculous! I much prefer Anna to Bradley, but I already agreed to.... wait, no, I told Anna in AP Euro a couple weeks ago that I'd go to her party. HELL YES! No more fuckin Bradley! Er. Not that I really would fuck him. He's hideous. And fat. And white. And therefore disgusting. But it's the principle of the thing.
Why do I get picked up by so many guys?
Weird.
Maybe the school is inhabited by chubby chasers.
By the way, I'm not cheating on JTJ because he hardly ever texts me or anything. The most romantic thing he did recently (besides kiss me) was sharing his math book with me during second period because I had "forgotten" mine. (The thing is damn heavy. No way I'm carrying that all over campus all day. Especially with Palmer. Not that I actually do carry Palmer, but...) So you see? He is not into me and I am, er, not into him. Yeah. That's right.
OH! Did I write about our lovely date? I must needs check.
I mentioned it, but I didn't write in detail.
*swoons*
Ok. Think I'm good now.
So, he picked me up at my house, right on time! Squee! I do so love that trait in others, as it so rarely is evidenced in myself! He was wearing his leather jacket, and da-a-a-a-a-a-amn, he looked fine! I just about passed out right there! Of course, I didn't look so bad either. I had on my little pencil skirt (which I am coincidentally wearing now), tights, my purple camisole top (attractively tight and low, but not so much as to look like Lucy The Slut), my denim jacket that makes me look like I'm in a gang whose emblems are rhinestones, and black flats. I even curled my hair! And I was only wearing lip gloss and eyeliner! I was being so modest, I felt like a nun. People were probably wondering why I was out of the convent. Anyway, so we went off (in his mom's car! LMFAO!) and I unfortunately had to meet his scary mom and brother. Why WAS his bro there anyway? Did he want to meet the pathetic girl who would date his fickle fraternal family member? Or did he just want to spot him some booty? He looked like he hadn't seen any (except for Link's from the Legend of Zelda) for years. Possibly decades. Or at least one decade. He didn't look very old. I think he was about thirteen. The mom was really nice, but scary. Probably because she was so nice. It was kind of freaking me out, I mean, usually I meet up with parents who will do anything to put you out of the spotlight, including (but not limited to) poison, hitmen, and transcribed music for Baby for string quartet and solo oboe. But this lady was all over me asking about my schedule, hair color, genealogy, mother's maiden name, and social security number. Maybe she wanted to impersonate me. Anyway, we got out, and went to market night. It was really fun, and it helped that people seemed to think we were a couple. KYAAHH! ♥ ♥ ♥ then we went to Gourmet Pizza and he bought food for me. TURN ON! (Not the food, the fact that he bought stuff for me) we talked about random stuff, and he's interesting! He's actually interesting! I could weep tears of blood and joy! HE'S FRIGGIN INTERESTING!!! So then we saw a movie, and he held my hand on the way over ♥ and then we went home. He walked me up to the door, and then kissed me! I didn't think he had the nerve, but he did, and it was friggin weird, because I actually liked it! Whenever I thought about it afterwards, I got that gooey feeling (not in THAT way! Fuck you!) and got all blushy and shit. Kind of embarrassing to admit, but I'm blushing even now writing this. It's like a month later, get a grip! Sexy shit. But then he texted Allie to tell her that he had fun (and I did too) and yeahh..... It's kind of weird. Allie has been like an agent for both of us, working behind the scenes. I feel bad for her. Also for Sonia. Like, for sure. When the guy you loved for months suddenly asks out your best friend without her lifting a finger, it's got to suck. Although I don't know. I've never been in that position. But I must speculate.
Actually, he's been talking to her more now that he's been talking to me.
Good, right? Or something.
HOLY HELL, I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING! Maybe he's doing it to get close to me!!!
*SLAP*
Jasmine, Jasmine, Jasmine. You are Le Idiot Extrémee if you actually believe that. Get that thought out of your brain.
Oh, ok, Sonia's home.
Gonna go hang out with her then.
Bye love.
Friday, February 25, 2011
ramblings on a fine and sexy man
I am completely energized from choreography now. I'm very bad at it, but I do derive a certain measure of entertainment from blithely leaping and bouncing atop the risers careless of time and place. So if I cause us to lose the competition, I shall at least have the satisfaction of knowing that I had a good time.
...Who am I kidding, I fuckin hate it.
So! Have I explained in full and descriptive detail my date with JTJ? *licks lips salaciously* Dayy-umm, that man is FIIIIIINE! He got an ass like ME! Wait, what?
So! The day after Valentine's Day (I got 10 valentines, by the by, NOT to brag or anything, just stating a pertinent fact), as I was walking with Allie from AP Euro to math, I stopped to put my folder into the choir room. (I had taken it home to learn my solo for Madonna as I am le understudy grande. FUUUUUUUUUU-) anyway, where was I? Oh yes. So as I was leaving, I tripped on something in the doorway. What could it be, I wondered? Slowly my eyes traveled up the length of a strangely familiar object. What was it? Oh yes, a leg. That's what it was called. And what was this spectacular leg doing here in my path to the sidewalk? Obviously, it was... at that particular moment, I lost my train of thought as I realized that attached to this leg was JTJ, and he was looking remarkably fine. "Hey," he said. "Gnnnnfrrgggh" I replied with alacrity. "What's up?" he continued. "Um...." said I, trying desperately to recall some of the tips in Cosmo for talking to extremely sexy guys. Was one supposed to flip one's hair and then cross one's legs, or the other way around? And did not this sequence of events necessitate a sitting position first? I realized it had been awhile since I had said anything. "Not much, you?" I asked suavely. Wonderful, he probably thought I was a moron. "I'm ok," he said. Well, this conversation was getting nowhere fast. Where the hell was Allie? Surely she would have something to add.I turned to my left, only to collide with a very startled looking Bonnie. "Hi," she said awkwardly, before running off to chitchat with HorseFace, probably about the wonderful Speech and Debate and Masturbate Club D'La Moronne. (Seriously, why do they like it so much? They are totally obsessed. It doesn't take mad skills to stand up and tout your own intelligence for half an hour! Talk show hosts do the same thing! And for much more pay, too.) "You busy on Thursday?" asked JTJ in his wonderfully sexy voice. (Actually, his voice is as annoying as fuck, but that doesn't make this story sound like a rejected romance novel from the 1970's, so let us gloss over that minor detail) "Not really!" I replied perkily. I knew what was coming, of course. Enough guys have asked me out that even I can see the signs. Plus I watch Glee. "Wanna go do something?" he asked, still trying to affect the "smooth" voice that would undoubtedly tug on my heart strings. It was certainly tugging on my patience. "Sure!" I said again, sounding like a hybrid between a cheerleader and an anime character. "Awesome," he said, and drifted off. Well! Welllll.... I floated over to Ivy and Allie, who may have for all I know been discussing world peace or the cure for cancer or the new album from My Chemical Romance or something equally wonderful. "Phweeehheeheheheeeee..." I sang. "I, he, that is, asked, I me, he..." "He asked her out," explained Allie, who had apparently been forewarned of this plan. "Yes, we, me, he... DAMN, HE IS FUCKIN SEXY!!!" I exploded at last, lacking milder words to express the joy in my soul. "When?" asked Ivy tersely, not impressed by my eloquence. "Thursdayyyyyy..." I sang again, then fell immediately to deciding what to wear. "Black? Or black and red?" I asked. "Or maybe nothing at-" "JASMINE!" interrupted Ivy conveniently. "This is so exciting!" chirped Bonnie, who, it appeared, knew of this as well. "I know, isn't it?" said Allie. "Jas has finally got a real man!" "Is he a REAL real man, though?" asked Karen seriously. "I heard he was totally gay." "Then why would he ask Jas out?" demanded Anna. Sexy shit, did the entire school know about this escapade? "Oh gosh..." I gasped. "He isn't just using me to prove his sexuality, is he?" "You'd certainly be good for that!" said Bonnie with a knowing wink. I knew it was a mistake to tell her about the Austin-cherry-popping-dick-boob fandango. Now the entire Speech team believes me to be a slut. (Actually, that's not really a new phenomena, so I shouldn't be worried) "No, he's not like that," said Anna reassuringly. "I think." Gee, thanks, hun. You really helped me out there. By this time, we had gotten to math, so we had to let our cheery gossip wait until Chem when Eva ambushed me. "Did he ask you?" she demanded. "Yeah, he-" I started to say, when a loathsome voice cut me off. "Whaaaaat's this? Jasmine got asked ouuuuuut? I didn't know the mental hospital had a visiting day!" It was Monsieur Le Pothead. "I guess they did, otherwise you wouldn't be here, right?" I asked him. He had to think about that one for a minute. "Um. Go die." he offered at last. Pot has a way of altering one's brain cell function in a deleterious manner. Poor boy, I must have wounded him deeply. It was a whole minute before he started asking me for my answers to the stoichiometry problems.
Still. La la, I'm happy!
Actually, no. After our little date (he even kissed me! Kyaah! And he's really bad at it! Tee hee!) he hasn't really talked to me much. So he probably finds me irritating.
SEXY SHIT! Speaking of irritating! Are ALL MEN so fucking OBNOXIOUS???!!!! Dad is being a total prickbag right now! Totally stupid. He is so ungrateful! I can't believe he has the temerity to try and dictate Mom's actions after she has done everything for him! Ugh, now he's trying to spy on me. Wonderful. I just love men, don't you?
Ok, I think I'll go eat a whole bunch of stuff and get fat as shit and be so unattractive that JTJ will hate me forever. Cause that's everyone's dream scenario, right?
...Who am I kidding, I fuckin hate it.
So! Have I explained in full and descriptive detail my date with JTJ? *licks lips salaciously* Dayy-umm, that man is FIIIIIINE! He got an ass like ME! Wait, what?
So! The day after Valentine's Day (I got 10 valentines, by the by, NOT to brag or anything, just stating a pertinent fact), as I was walking with Allie from AP Euro to math, I stopped to put my folder into the choir room. (I had taken it home to learn my solo for Madonna as I am le understudy grande. FUUUUUUUUUU-) anyway, where was I? Oh yes. So as I was leaving, I tripped on something in the doorway. What could it be, I wondered? Slowly my eyes traveled up the length of a strangely familiar object. What was it? Oh yes, a leg. That's what it was called. And what was this spectacular leg doing here in my path to the sidewalk? Obviously, it was... at that particular moment, I lost my train of thought as I realized that attached to this leg was JTJ, and he was looking remarkably fine. "Hey," he said. "Gnnnnfrrgggh" I replied with alacrity. "What's up?" he continued. "Um...." said I, trying desperately to recall some of the tips in Cosmo for talking to extremely sexy guys. Was one supposed to flip one's hair and then cross one's legs, or the other way around? And did not this sequence of events necessitate a sitting position first? I realized it had been awhile since I had said anything. "Not much, you?" I asked suavely. Wonderful, he probably thought I was a moron. "I'm ok," he said. Well, this conversation was getting nowhere fast. Where the hell was Allie? Surely she would have something to add.I turned to my left, only to collide with a very startled looking Bonnie. "Hi," she said awkwardly, before running off to chitchat with HorseFace, probably about the wonderful Speech and Debate and Masturbate Club D'La Moronne. (Seriously, why do they like it so much? They are totally obsessed. It doesn't take mad skills to stand up and tout your own intelligence for half an hour! Talk show hosts do the same thing! And for much more pay, too.) "You busy on Thursday?" asked JTJ in his wonderfully sexy voice. (Actually, his voice is as annoying as fuck, but that doesn't make this story sound like a rejected romance novel from the 1970's, so let us gloss over that minor detail) "Not really!" I replied perkily. I knew what was coming, of course. Enough guys have asked me out that even I can see the signs. Plus I watch Glee. "Wanna go do something?" he asked, still trying to affect the "smooth" voice that would undoubtedly tug on my heart strings. It was certainly tugging on my patience. "Sure!" I said again, sounding like a hybrid between a cheerleader and an anime character. "Awesome," he said, and drifted off. Well! Welllll.... I floated over to Ivy and Allie, who may have for all I know been discussing world peace or the cure for cancer or the new album from My Chemical Romance or something equally wonderful. "Phweeehheeheheheeeee..." I sang. "I, he, that is, asked, I me, he..." "He asked her out," explained Allie, who had apparently been forewarned of this plan. "Yes, we, me, he... DAMN, HE IS FUCKIN SEXY!!!" I exploded at last, lacking milder words to express the joy in my soul. "When?" asked Ivy tersely, not impressed by my eloquence. "Thursdayyyyyy..." I sang again, then fell immediately to deciding what to wear. "Black? Or black and red?" I asked. "Or maybe nothing at-" "JASMINE!" interrupted Ivy conveniently. "This is so exciting!" chirped Bonnie, who, it appeared, knew of this as well. "I know, isn't it?" said Allie. "Jas has finally got a real man!" "Is he a REAL real man, though?" asked Karen seriously. "I heard he was totally gay." "Then why would he ask Jas out?" demanded Anna. Sexy shit, did the entire school know about this escapade? "Oh gosh..." I gasped. "He isn't just using me to prove his sexuality, is he?" "You'd certainly be good for that!" said Bonnie with a knowing wink. I knew it was a mistake to tell her about the Austin-cherry-popping-dick-boob fandango. Now the entire Speech team believes me to be a slut. (Actually, that's not really a new phenomena, so I shouldn't be worried) "No, he's not like that," said Anna reassuringly. "I think." Gee, thanks, hun. You really helped me out there. By this time, we had gotten to math, so we had to let our cheery gossip wait until Chem when Eva ambushed me. "Did he ask you?" she demanded. "Yeah, he-" I started to say, when a loathsome voice cut me off. "Whaaaaat's this? Jasmine got asked ouuuuuut? I didn't know the mental hospital had a visiting day!" It was Monsieur Le Pothead. "I guess they did, otherwise you wouldn't be here, right?" I asked him. He had to think about that one for a minute. "Um. Go die." he offered at last. Pot has a way of altering one's brain cell function in a deleterious manner. Poor boy, I must have wounded him deeply. It was a whole minute before he started asking me for my answers to the stoichiometry problems.
Still. La la, I'm happy!
Actually, no. After our little date (he even kissed me! Kyaah! And he's really bad at it! Tee hee!) he hasn't really talked to me much. So he probably finds me irritating.
SEXY SHIT! Speaking of irritating! Are ALL MEN so fucking OBNOXIOUS???!!!! Dad is being a total prickbag right now! Totally stupid. He is so ungrateful! I can't believe he has the temerity to try and dictate Mom's actions after she has done everything for him! Ugh, now he's trying to spy on me. Wonderful. I just love men, don't you?
Ok, I think I'll go eat a whole bunch of stuff and get fat as shit and be so unattractive that JTJ will hate me forever. Cause that's everyone's dream scenario, right?
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Yeah, it's short. Eff you.
Killer queen ♥
Hell yeah, that's me.
...I wish.
Dammit! I scored a date with Le Hotpot (HP) but after that he didn't really blow up my phone with texts, so I didn't text him back and he never said hi to me in AP Euro OR math, and so I think he hates me now! SEXY SHIT! The one effing time I get asked out by mi amour, he turns out to bear a deep grudge against my boobs! (Or something. I mean, he's a guy, so he should naturally think of me as sex in a skirt. Actually, that should be my new nickname. Sex-in-a-skirt. I like it! It has a more positive connotation than Le Stupid Cunt, which is the nickname I had previously been using for myself ever since the start of freshman year. More classy, don't you think?) Anyway, that's actually quite a problemo. He never made lewd comments fornication-ward, and never told me in exquisite detail the many attributes of his cock. Should I be worried? What the heck, of course I should. Besides the fact that he obviously does not like me, he may quite possibly be gay. Actually, I think he might be. He certainly acts like it. (Smart, hot, sexy, witty, nice, etc) Oh! Speaking of gay, I am almost absolutely certain that CTC and A are. I saw them smooching after class today and K said she saw them getting hot and heavy behind the risers after choreography. Day-ummm! What will happen when they break up? When CTC breaks up with A that is. She dated five guys in one month. That's worse than me! For a freshman, she sure gets around! Cough*slut*cough.
Maybe I shouldn't be badmouthing my own choir sister.
Wait, I'm not! Being a slut is a GOOD thing! Exhibit A, me!
Ok, bye.
Hell yeah, that's me.
...I wish.
Dammit! I scored a date with Le Hotpot (HP) but after that he didn't really blow up my phone with texts, so I didn't text him back and he never said hi to me in AP Euro OR math, and so I think he hates me now! SEXY SHIT! The one effing time I get asked out by mi amour, he turns out to bear a deep grudge against my boobs! (Or something. I mean, he's a guy, so he should naturally think of me as sex in a skirt. Actually, that should be my new nickname. Sex-in-a-skirt. I like it! It has a more positive connotation than Le Stupid Cunt, which is the nickname I had previously been using for myself ever since the start of freshman year. More classy, don't you think?) Anyway, that's actually quite a problemo. He never made lewd comments fornication-ward, and never told me in exquisite detail the many attributes of his cock. Should I be worried? What the heck, of course I should. Besides the fact that he obviously does not like me, he may quite possibly be gay. Actually, I think he might be. He certainly acts like it. (Smart, hot, sexy, witty, nice, etc) Oh! Speaking of gay, I am almost absolutely certain that CTC and A are. I saw them smooching after class today and K said she saw them getting hot and heavy behind the risers after choreography. Day-ummm! What will happen when they break up? When CTC breaks up with A that is. She dated five guys in one month. That's worse than me! For a freshman, she sure gets around! Cough*slut*cough.
Maybe I shouldn't be badmouthing my own choir sister.
Wait, I'm not! Being a slut is a GOOD thing! Exhibit A, me!
Ok, bye.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Darn ramblings.
So, I went out with Austin.
I'm just going to pretend that's it's NOT 3:30 in the morning right now, because this story is amusing and also centered on me and a cute boy and therefore needs to be told in extremity. So.
Yesterday I was staying up until all hours texting people, as per normal. (Btw, Sonia seems to think that I'm her personal psychologist or something. She has been texting me with very depressing and emo statements for the last several days, and also asking my opinion on the SAME DAMN SUBJECT for about the same duration. Sexy shit, what am I, a problem dump? I have feelings TOO! GOSH! *storms out*) Anyway... where was I? Ah, yes. So I was also texting Austin, because that is always amusing. He asked me what I was doing today (oh, how subtle-not), and when I said probably watching Glee and eating leftover chocolate cake, he said, and I quote, "u should slip some hang with Austin in there =)". So I said sure, and then today he came driving up in his red sports car and picked me up. We went to Gourmet Pizza. He bought mine! Hell yes! Not spending money is something I approve of vastly. After that, we walked around the city for awhile, and then got boba. He bought that for me too. Um, can I say total TURN-ON? There's nothing sexier than a guy who won't make you buy your own food. At any rate, he's actually a pretty interesting person (for a white guy). He actually understood what I said and didn't gawp like a goldfish with head trauma every time I used a word with more than two syllables, which is really a plus (Cough*Justin*cough). He is even not a conservative prick, and doesn't want to go to an Adventist college! And I can even be myself around him (ish), and by that I mean not worrying if I accidentally let fly a few f-bombs or so. And get this! He opened the door for me! OPENED THE FRIGGIN DOOR! Even the car door! I can't believe it! He was very chivalrous! Yet he didn't stare at my boobs or my ass, ask my bra size, suggest a game of truth-or-striptease, make jokes about my personal anatomy or the inferior mental condition of the feminine sex, or ask me what I would do if we happened to be stuck together in a small and very sexually charged room, so I cannot but help feeling that he doesn't like me. Oh well. He texted me tonight saying that he had had fun and thanks and we should go out again (!!!!!!) and also that I was "really damn cute". SHIT! This guy is either the most playing player or he's bored out of his friggin mind! I've NEVER seen a guy be that intelligible before! He only misspelled about 1% of his words! And he is... well, I gotta say it. Even if I am a disgrace to my family name, it must be said. HE IS A DAMN SEXY PIECE OF ASS! There. I have said it. Even if his voice is so low that it's practically impossible to discern over the sound of Down With The Sickness and Rise Against (Oh yes! We like the same music! Except he doesn't listen to a lot of opera... but oh well. No one I've met besides me and Maya does). And he bought me stuff! HE BOUGHT ME STUFF! This is the best date I've ever been on! I barely needed to restrain my sarcasm, because HE WAS DOING IT TOO! (Making sarcastic remarks, that is.) I'm so happy... La la la. ♪ To celebrate, I'm going to sleep until about four tomorrow. Probably because it's about four right now. That could have something to do with it, could it not? Perhaps. Oh dang. I stay up waaaaay too late girlfriend. But then again, Kitty and Zac are up too. What is this, the cohort of insomniacs or something? Probably.
Jade was happy about my newfound loverboy too.
AH HOT SHIT! Don't tell me I'm going to turn into one of those semen spewing psychopaths who never miss a chance to make a plug about their wonderful man! And by never, I mean NEVER. They would advertise his ass at your grandmother's funeral. PLEASE no. Oh yes, Jade is one. She is also dating a fifteen year old. ANd she is eighteen. But it's ok, because they "love" each other. Have I mentioned that he's fifteen? And that they have only met online, have never talked, and have never seen anything more than "real" pictures? And that they have cybersex? ANd that occasionally SHE initiates it? Oh flipping wallaby diapers, she's fucking desperate. I am positive that he is a fifty year old man in actuality. And she tries to lecture me? Seriously! Can you spell hypocrite? She has, it seems, been misspelling her name on all her papers. I hope the professors don't decide to take points off for that.
Nine Inch Nails, man, Nine Inch Nails.
Gotta love them.
Austin does.
SHIT, brain, SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Really now. We can't have you sounding like a brain impaired junior high school student (or anyone currently in Jersey Shore for that matter).
Or Sonia.
Honestly, she still likes JTJ! Really ridiculous. I can't believe that she's so serious about him. He's just a normal guy! He wears pants like everybody else! Although if he didn't, I'm not sure that would send him up in her esteem with a noticeable prejudice. She seems to be a modest, not-wanting-in-the-sack-on-the-first-date kind of gal. Isn't there a name for that? Ah yes. SHIPOOPI. You know, for the longest time, I never realized that was from an actual musical. I always thought it was an original from Seth McFarlane and his Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy, but there you go. Just goes to show how much I know.
I would swallow my pride
I would choke on the rinds
But the lack thereof would leave me empty inside
I would swallow my doubt
Turn it inside out
Find nothing but faith in nothing
I would put my tender
Heart in a blender
Watch it spin around to a beautiful oblivion
Rendezvous, then I'm through with you....
I sure do have eclectic taste in music. Eve 6? Really? I've gone soft. Maybe I should dig up that old German slaughtering tribe band again? I may have missed their charm the first time. After all, chants about sodomy and necrophilia have a way of creating a negative first impression, but they would probably grow on you if you indulged in them a bit more.
Same with Cannibal Corpse. I may have found his apparent mental instability a bit unnerving at first, but if I really took the time to listen to such deceptively tender love songs such as Hammer Smashed Face and Make Them Suffer, I'm sure I could really learn to see the genius in the process, not to mention the execution.
It's all just a matter of acclimation, really.
Now whomever so reads this in the future will think that I'm a raving sociopath who listens to death metal all day. That is... not true. Not. True. I also listen to nihilistic metal.
But at any rate, I'm not as depraved as those who would wantonly listen to Justin Bieber and Hannah Montana, so I suppose whatever I do is in the clear.
I kind of want to go outside now. Like, go out and ride around the streets like the vampire child that I am. Except it's too cold. That's the only problem.
SHIT.
I'm just going to pretend that's it's NOT 3:30 in the morning right now, because this story is amusing and also centered on me and a cute boy and therefore needs to be told in extremity. So.
Yesterday I was staying up until all hours texting people, as per normal. (Btw, Sonia seems to think that I'm her personal psychologist or something. She has been texting me with very depressing and emo statements for the last several days, and also asking my opinion on the SAME DAMN SUBJECT for about the same duration. Sexy shit, what am I, a problem dump? I have feelings TOO! GOSH! *storms out*) Anyway... where was I? Ah, yes. So I was also texting Austin, because that is always amusing. He asked me what I was doing today (oh, how subtle-not), and when I said probably watching Glee and eating leftover chocolate cake, he said, and I quote, "u should slip some hang with Austin in there =)". So I said sure, and then today he came driving up in his red sports car and picked me up. We went to Gourmet Pizza. He bought mine! Hell yes! Not spending money is something I approve of vastly. After that, we walked around the city for awhile, and then got boba. He bought that for me too. Um, can I say total TURN-ON? There's nothing sexier than a guy who won't make you buy your own food. At any rate, he's actually a pretty interesting person (for a white guy). He actually understood what I said and didn't gawp like a goldfish with head trauma every time I used a word with more than two syllables, which is really a plus (Cough*Justin*cough). He is even not a conservative prick, and doesn't want to go to an Adventist college! And I can even be myself around him (ish), and by that I mean not worrying if I accidentally let fly a few f-bombs or so. And get this! He opened the door for me! OPENED THE FRIGGIN DOOR! Even the car door! I can't believe it! He was very chivalrous! Yet he didn't stare at my boobs or my ass, ask my bra size, suggest a game of truth-or-striptease, make jokes about my personal anatomy or the inferior mental condition of the feminine sex, or ask me what I would do if we happened to be stuck together in a small and very sexually charged room, so I cannot but help feeling that he doesn't like me. Oh well. He texted me tonight saying that he had had fun and thanks and we should go out again (!!!!!!) and also that I was "really damn cute". SHIT! This guy is either the most playing player or he's bored out of his friggin mind! I've NEVER seen a guy be that intelligible before! He only misspelled about 1% of his words! And he is... well, I gotta say it. Even if I am a disgrace to my family name, it must be said. HE IS A DAMN SEXY PIECE OF ASS! There. I have said it. Even if his voice is so low that it's practically impossible to discern over the sound of Down With The Sickness and Rise Against (Oh yes! We like the same music! Except he doesn't listen to a lot of opera... but oh well. No one I've met besides me and Maya does). And he bought me stuff! HE BOUGHT ME STUFF! This is the best date I've ever been on! I barely needed to restrain my sarcasm, because HE WAS DOING IT TOO! (Making sarcastic remarks, that is.) I'm so happy... La la la. ♪ To celebrate, I'm going to sleep until about four tomorrow. Probably because it's about four right now. That could have something to do with it, could it not? Perhaps. Oh dang. I stay up waaaaay too late girlfriend. But then again, Kitty and Zac are up too. What is this, the cohort of insomniacs or something? Probably.
Jade was happy about my newfound loverboy too.
AH HOT SHIT! Don't tell me I'm going to turn into one of those semen spewing psychopaths who never miss a chance to make a plug about their wonderful man! And by never, I mean NEVER. They would advertise his ass at your grandmother's funeral. PLEASE no. Oh yes, Jade is one. She is also dating a fifteen year old. ANd she is eighteen. But it's ok, because they "love" each other. Have I mentioned that he's fifteen? And that they have only met online, have never talked, and have never seen anything more than "real" pictures? And that they have cybersex? ANd that occasionally SHE initiates it? Oh flipping wallaby diapers, she's fucking desperate. I am positive that he is a fifty year old man in actuality. And she tries to lecture me? Seriously! Can you spell hypocrite? She has, it seems, been misspelling her name on all her papers. I hope the professors don't decide to take points off for that.
Nine Inch Nails, man, Nine Inch Nails.
Gotta love them.
Austin does.
SHIT, brain, SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Really now. We can't have you sounding like a brain impaired junior high school student (or anyone currently in Jersey Shore for that matter).
Or Sonia.
Honestly, she still likes JTJ! Really ridiculous. I can't believe that she's so serious about him. He's just a normal guy! He wears pants like everybody else! Although if he didn't, I'm not sure that would send him up in her esteem with a noticeable prejudice. She seems to be a modest, not-wanting-in-the-sack-on-the-first-date kind of gal. Isn't there a name for that? Ah yes. SHIPOOPI. You know, for the longest time, I never realized that was from an actual musical. I always thought it was an original from Seth McFarlane and his Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy, but there you go. Just goes to show how much I know.
I would swallow my pride
I would choke on the rinds
But the lack thereof would leave me empty inside
I would swallow my doubt
Turn it inside out
Find nothing but faith in nothing
I would put my tender
Heart in a blender
Watch it spin around to a beautiful oblivion
Rendezvous, then I'm through with you....
I sure do have eclectic taste in music. Eve 6? Really? I've gone soft. Maybe I should dig up that old German slaughtering tribe band again? I may have missed their charm the first time. After all, chants about sodomy and necrophilia have a way of creating a negative first impression, but they would probably grow on you if you indulged in them a bit more.
Same with Cannibal Corpse. I may have found his apparent mental instability a bit unnerving at first, but if I really took the time to listen to such deceptively tender love songs such as Hammer Smashed Face and Make Them Suffer, I'm sure I could really learn to see the genius in the process, not to mention the execution.
It's all just a matter of acclimation, really.
Now whomever so reads this in the future will think that I'm a raving sociopath who listens to death metal all day. That is... not true. Not. True. I also listen to nihilistic metal.
But at any rate, I'm not as depraved as those who would wantonly listen to Justin Bieber and Hannah Montana, so I suppose whatever I do is in the clear.
I kind of want to go outside now. Like, go out and ride around the streets like the vampire child that I am. Except it's too cold. That's the only problem.
SHIT.
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Rain ♥
It's so dark in here that I can hardly see the keyboard. And it's only 3:07! This is cause for rejoicing. (I'm a vampire, so I neither love nor need the light.)
It's raining again. This is a happy-making thing that makes me, er, happy...
Oh shit, whatever. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore.
So this "morning", I came downstairs, bright and early at 2:15 to eat some breakfast. I thought I'd partake of the food that I so kindly absconded with yesterday after the never-ending cantata, but some fool had eaten it all! I mean, really, how rude. I go to all the trouble of sneaking away with it (and let me tell you, it was no easy feat) and then what happens? It disappears down the gullet of some ravenous relative! Honestly.
I want to go shopping. I need to buy presents for my friends, or at least a few of them, and I want to take more photobooth pictures. I don't have enough. I want to make a collage out of pictures (of me, naturally) and put it into the front of my binder so that I can stare at something when Mr. Annoying English Teacher is droning on and on and staring at me so I can't draw (he seems to think it's a crime against humanity for a girl to engage in some harmless amusement during the idle hours of third period or something). So I, as you see, need to go take some pictures. Allie, Sophia, Lia, and several others all want to go with me. So does KiKi. *SNICKER* That child needs a lot more than a shopping trip, believe ME... Actually, she's not really a child, is she. She's eighteen. And she has been eighteen for some time. Is it not odd that she is still in high school? And that she does not know how to write a three paragraph essay? And that I have seen kindergarteners with better writing than her? It is. And her drawings! Oh my, it is hilarious to see the airs she puts on about them. She has decided to start up a manga magazine. This is a lovely idea in theory, but when all the characters of said manga look like retarded dinosaurs, it is perhaps best to start in on a new vocation (such as maybe learning what calculus is). Even worse, she has recruited Kitty and me to help her out. I was happy at first to do this, because I do like to draw, and though no Tokyopop would ever hire me for my talent, I do have to admit that one can at least tell what I'm trying to depict 99% of the time. But then KiKi decided that I wasn't good enough for her, and gave away my promised spot in the magazine to some "girl" she met online. I believe that this person is actually a fifty year old man, but there you have it. I am, as we all know, rather pessimistic. I don't care THAT much, but it is rather annoying, especially when she starts complaining that I never do anything.Tell that to the voluminous tomes that I have made out of the hardworkingness of my own procrastination. Oh! And her smelly brother who STILL likes me? He does NOTHING! LESS than nothing! He does NEGATIVE effort! So she needn't be touting Kitty's and my indolence as a source of damnation! Sexy shit. This chick.
If she IS a chick. She has the most enormous amount of pubic hair that I have ever seen.
And I know this because she decided to change in front of me.
Bless my soul, I don't know how I survived that day.
...HOT PATOOTIE, BLESS MY SOUL! I REALLY LOVE THAT ROCK AND ROLL!
Rocky Horror Show ftw. ♥
So I think I'm going to actually do my studying ahead of time during this break. On Thanksgiving break, I was up until four on Sunday desperately trying to finish my assignments ere broke the dawn. I had a lot too. EVERYONE assigned something, even choir. We had to write concert reports. Ugh. So THIS time, I'm going to do EVERYTHING! And then I can play for the rest of the break! Or study, more likely. Actually, I don't even have anything except AP Euro. And in that, I just have to read and do some IDs. Which should be extremely easy. Oh happy joyful day of joyous happiness....
I'm going to go take a picture of the persimmon tree in the rain. It looks bomb. And by bomb, I mean like a set off of some emo movie about depression in a time of sadness. Lovely! ♥
It's raining again. This is a happy-making thing that makes me, er, happy...
Oh shit, whatever. I don't even know what I'm saying anymore.
So this "morning", I came downstairs, bright and early at 2:15 to eat some breakfast. I thought I'd partake of the food that I so kindly absconded with yesterday after the never-ending cantata, but some fool had eaten it all! I mean, really, how rude. I go to all the trouble of sneaking away with it (and let me tell you, it was no easy feat) and then what happens? It disappears down the gullet of some ravenous relative! Honestly.
I want to go shopping. I need to buy presents for my friends, or at least a few of them, and I want to take more photobooth pictures. I don't have enough. I want to make a collage out of pictures (of me, naturally) and put it into the front of my binder so that I can stare at something when Mr. Annoying English Teacher is droning on and on and staring at me so I can't draw (he seems to think it's a crime against humanity for a girl to engage in some harmless amusement during the idle hours of third period or something). So I, as you see, need to go take some pictures. Allie, Sophia, Lia, and several others all want to go with me. So does KiKi. *SNICKER* That child needs a lot more than a shopping trip, believe ME... Actually, she's not really a child, is she. She's eighteen. And she has been eighteen for some time. Is it not odd that she is still in high school? And that she does not know how to write a three paragraph essay? And that I have seen kindergarteners with better writing than her? It is. And her drawings! Oh my, it is hilarious to see the airs she puts on about them. She has decided to start up a manga magazine. This is a lovely idea in theory, but when all the characters of said manga look like retarded dinosaurs, it is perhaps best to start in on a new vocation (such as maybe learning what calculus is). Even worse, she has recruited Kitty and me to help her out. I was happy at first to do this, because I do like to draw, and though no Tokyopop would ever hire me for my talent, I do have to admit that one can at least tell what I'm trying to depict 99% of the time. But then KiKi decided that I wasn't good enough for her, and gave away my promised spot in the magazine to some "girl" she met online. I believe that this person is actually a fifty year old man, but there you have it. I am, as we all know, rather pessimistic. I don't care THAT much, but it is rather annoying, especially when she starts complaining that I never do anything.Tell that to the voluminous tomes that I have made out of the hardworkingness of my own procrastination. Oh! And her smelly brother who STILL likes me? He does NOTHING! LESS than nothing! He does NEGATIVE effort! So she needn't be touting Kitty's and my indolence as a source of damnation! Sexy shit. This chick.
If she IS a chick. She has the most enormous amount of pubic hair that I have ever seen.
And I know this because she decided to change in front of me.
Bless my soul, I don't know how I survived that day.
...HOT PATOOTIE, BLESS MY SOUL! I REALLY LOVE THAT ROCK AND ROLL!
Rocky Horror Show ftw. ♥
So I think I'm going to actually do my studying ahead of time during this break. On Thanksgiving break, I was up until four on Sunday desperately trying to finish my assignments ere broke the dawn. I had a lot too. EVERYONE assigned something, even choir. We had to write concert reports. Ugh. So THIS time, I'm going to do EVERYTHING! And then I can play for the rest of the break! Or study, more likely. Actually, I don't even have anything except AP Euro. And in that, I just have to read and do some IDs. Which should be extremely easy. Oh happy joyful day of joyous happiness....
I'm going to go take a picture of the persimmon tree in the rain. It looks bomb. And by bomb, I mean like a set off of some emo movie about depression in a time of sadness. Lovely! ♥
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