Procrastination, really

Look at this lovely exchange.
Austin: But I want to go to dinner with you!
Me: Nah tho, you would be so traumatized that you would run away to sea :P
Austin: I think you'd be traumatized to sea me eat actually ;D
Me: I have seen you eat! It didn't produce any unhappy em-oceans in me!
Austin: When I'm eating at my messiest, to be Pacific.
Me: Beach please, I can eat more grossly than you can under-sand.
Austin: No really, I just gulf everything down.
Me: But I'm so messy... I wouldn't be surprised if Island face first in my food someday.
Austin: You should eat with me, if you canal be your bffl
Me: I think that might provoke some in-clam-ent problems :P
Austin: I accept you for who you are, you sea.
Me: Aww. You seal-y, I don't know if you want to say such an unshellfish thing around me!
Austin: Whale you know I'm dolphinately yours until the rivers all run dry ♥
Me: Babe, my heart is an open brook to you ♥
Austin: I may stream to play it cool sometimes, but the truth is that I'm crazy for you ♥
Austin: I spend my day pond-ering ways to make you smile :)
Me: Aww, I lake everything about you :D
Austin: But I'm such a pool :(
Me: But you're my pool, and what I fish for ♥
Austin: You make me so happy, it has me floundering about ♥
Me: You make my heart scallop ♥
Austin: I can never be crabby around you ♥
Me: You're my golden star-fish!
Austin: I wish I had bigger mussels, then I could be all sexy for you and stuff maybe
Me: You're as beautiful as a seascape; don't cl-oyster yourself away!
Austin: You make me want to be a betta person :)
Me: I know you've heard this anemany times, but you're so perfect already!
Austin: How can I feel perfect when my girlfriend is a mermaid among a sea of guppies
Me: You are perfect though, you're the lamprey of sunshine in my life and you know it!
Austin: My heart feels like a whirlpool when I think of you :)
Me: I will shower you with love everyday :D  speaking of which, I probably should go shower.
Isn't he lovely? He knows I like wordplay, so he plays with words with me! I appreciate that so highly! Most people won't do that. Not even Francisco. So I just think it's so amazing and wonderful that he's willing to be silly with me. I'm so lucky!
Okay, Jasmine, that's enough. Ugh, I'm going to want to slap myself later when I read this and see how myopic and lovestruck I was. I got it bad, I do!
I'm at the library right now, starting my paper for Lit. It should be fun, I think, but I'm afraid I won't be able to do well! I know I was good at this sort of thing back in AP Lit, but is that enough now? I'm going up against juniors and seniors here, most of them English majors, and I'm sure they can smoke me. What if I don't do well? What if I get something other than an A in an English class? That's the very definition of humiliation. I have to do well, that's all! I'm starting this paper early, so I can work on it through the week and revise it as needed. I got this, I got this. Right?
This library is so packed full of people. Why are these nerds in here? They need to get a life and not be like me! Come on now. I went to the 11th floor, but it was all full, so I went to the 10th floor to see if I could sit in one of the window seats. There was a guy who had two chairs around him, not with his stuff on them or anything, and just sitting there. I thought maybe I could use one of them, since he didn't seem to be, so I went up and asked him if I could have a chair. He looked at me, shook his head, and went "No, no." And off I scuttled, blushing and embarrassed, and feeling as if I really should have stayed in my dorm. Now I'm on my favorite floor, the 9th floor (which is the literature one), and I'm happy in a nice little window seat here, but I feel extraordinarily awkward anyway. Why am I so awkward? I need to grow some balls! You know, this is becoming a problem for me. I asked a question in class today, and afterwards, I was shaking so hard I could barely write. I love the class so much, but I feel like the teacher won't like me because I never talk. This is my logic class, see. So, you know, I'm very adept so far, and I always know what he's talking about and when he asks something, I always know the answer, but I can't make myself say it! Even if the room is in stumped silence and I'm the only one with a clue, I just sit there like an idiot. I try, I really do, but when I open my mouth, nothing comes out. Sometimes, I manage to whisper the answer, and someone near me hears it and repeats it, and the matter is taken care of that way, but often the poor teacher has to explain it all over again, just because I was too weirdly shy to say anything. That's how I was in high school too, but in high school, there was usually someone else to say the answers (except in Lit, but I had no trouble talking in that class). Now it's just me, and I can't do it. I'm so ashamed of myself! Why can I not be normal? I wonder if anyone else in the world is as strange as I am.
Other than that, though, the class is so beautiful. We had to do six proofs for homework last night, three of them normal, and three of them hard. I had no trouble with the three easy ones, but I was missing a step on the three harder ones, and I couldn't quite finish them. I thought I was being stupid, and I was all embarrassed, but then when I got to class, it turned out that they were technically possible, but so un-intuitive that feasibly, they weren't really viable for us at this stage. Then I was proud of myself for getting as far as I did, because I had the right idea, I just hadn't taken it far enough. And everyone else was more stumped than I'd been. In fact, they'd had trouble with the normal proofs too. So I walked out of class feeling powerful and ready to take anyone on. I wish I could have that feeling more often, like when I'm about to get food, or walk past a group of people by myself. That would be nice.
It rained a little bit last night. It was very pleasant! Very soporific, you know, and cozy to hear while lying in bed wrapped up in blankets. It's gotten colder recently, and I'm wearing a sweater now, which feels very collegiate and autumnal, and it's such a welcome change.
Oh, there's a kid in here. Why? He's cute and all, but I hope he doesn't try to talk to me. I'm afraid of children. I will never be a mother. What do you even do with kids? I will be alone in life forever. Oh, but you know, I fear mothers even more than I fear kids. They are always so unfriendly, and they act like they are superior to everyone, and they have no sense of boundaries. This particular mom seems to have some, but in general, moms won't care if their kids climb all over you and pull your hair and whatnot, because it's cute. They're just like dog owners. I don't like people, man, I don't like them at all. I'm going to move to a cave and walk around dispensing Zarathustra-esque advice. Wait, no, then I would have to have followers and all. This is a problem, then!
I have orchestra pretty soon. I should leave in ten minutes. It's at 6:30, but I have to go back to my dorm and drop off Daisy Bell and get my violin and then walk over to the school of music, so I need to leave enough time to do that. I was late to both my classes already today, and I'm not angling for a third. It's so weird to have only three classes per day, it almost seems like I'm not doing anything worthwhile. I would take more classes if I could, but I'm already at 18 credit hours, and I can't add anymore at this point anyway. I guess I am taking eight classes, but it doesn't seem like it. At this point, it probably sounds like I'm looking for things to feel insecure about, so maybe I should stop. I'm going to turn into a truly irritating person soon, if I haven't already. Bleh.
Okay, I should probably pack up and go down soon, so off I go! You can do this, Jasmine. You got this. You are a strong, independent woman who knows the rudiments of propositional logic and who can spell "chiaroscuro," and no one can bring you down! Let's go!