Monday, December 29, 2008

crud, im pissed

Yup, indeed, Bi Boy and Princess TiTi are coming along to Little Tokyo. Jade came over this morning and told me. Great, great great.... What the heck am I gonna do about that? It's not that I hate TiTi, it's just that I think she should be excavated off the face of the earth to save humanity. But, really, why would Jade invite Mr. Katy Perry, Robotica, and Ima Pain to come with us for the day? It sucks! I'mma maybe call her up right now and ditch! Although that would be quite mean. But it would be nice to myself, as you can see. Does Jade really want me along? I can't imagine that she does. So ditching right now shouldn't bug her too bad, should it? Oh, but Kitty want's to go. Crud, now I have to go to my death for the sake of an emo eleven year old. But! I will Move Along! Really, who wouldn't lurrrve the All American Rejects? So cute, seriously!
Ugh, now I don't want to go. What will I do? Should I go along and commit suicide, or should I stay home and commit social suicide? Ohhhhh... now that you put it that way, I guess I better go along. It's better to be dead than lonely, indeed. No, all you homeschooled dorks wouldn't understand that, would you. It's because.... We all need a friend or two (prefferably two) to help us out. Plus, we all need a boyfriend. The girls, that is. It would be rather alarming if everyone did have a boyfriend, wouldn't it? I'm sure someone would like it that way though....
OHHHHHH DARN IT!!!!! I ABSOLUTELY DON"T WANNA GO HANG OUT WITH THE DEADBEATS OF THE CENTURY!!!!!
Ok, maybe not deadbeats. Maybe just Grateful Dead fans. (nasty snicker) Wait, that's the same thing, isn't it? Woooops! My bad!
What should I wear? Should I go for the slut campaign again? I've heard Mr. Gay is also Mr. Perv, so maybe I shouldn't go for the cupcake look. Maybe I should go for the uuuuuugly look, but then TiTi will make fun of me. Darn! Maybe I should wear just nondescript clothes, like, from Old Navy or somehthing. Noooooooo! I can't! I don't think I even own Old Navy clothes! That goes totally against my standards of fashion and beauty! I mean, I want to fit in, but I also need to stand out. So, you see, I can't wear anything that's too simple. Even when I was trying to deflect Mini Perv Thomas at church orch, I wore really flashy ugly clothes, instead of boring ugly clothes. I even wore a red and black wig one time... Naturalish though, not clowny. I better wear tons of makeup and perfume. Like, maybe I should put it on in the car, it'll be a long ride, so that'll be something to do, at least.
Oh, I just listened to If U Seek Amy. It's so.... interesting.... Better not let the rents listen to it, though, because of the, well, you know.
Yup.
EW! t.A.T.u is DISGUSTING!!! They got billed as gay when they were only thirteen??!!!! Why the heck would you agree to that? I think I would throw up.
Apologize.... I like that song. For some reason, even though it's all mean and stuff.
Oh yeah, I never wrote about Kitty's birthday, did I! So, Kitty wanted to go shopping, so me and Mom and her all went out to the mall (crappy mall, but who cares), and various boutiques, and we ended by going to Starbucks. I got a peppermint mocha twist with whipped cream. I should have gotten a frappucino... Well, who cares. I got this peacock blue tunic top at Gottschalks for seven bucks, and Kitty got these black and gold jeans for eighteen bucks. It is her birthday, after all... I guess I like the brand Eyeshadow ok. My favorite is still Papaya and Miss Me, though. Fortunately, those brands are popular with my friend Liana (who's soooooo popular, rich, and lucky), Zac's friend, and our relatives, so I get a lot of good clothes. Or at least expensive clothes, and poor Kitty has to wear the hand-me-downs! Nyah, I'm so lucky.
I just watched a couple of Me Singing (blank) videos on Youtube. Most of their voices sound about like mine... Do you think I could make one? How about if I didn't show my face and I put up a fake name? Then do you think Mom would let me? Probably, right? Oh, but I'd need to sing Teardrops On My Guitar or something, so I could play it with myself and not sing solo. Not that that's bad, it's just harder.
I promised Sungmin I'd give him the computer when this song ends. I really should have chosen a really long song, like Sorry or Hung Up, but nooo, dumb me, I decided to play Fall To Pieces. Crud. Oh well, I'll just type really fast. I guess that's all, actually, cause I want to... do something... Eheheheh... You will never know what it is! Ok, I'mma just make another gmail account so I can use it for things... but, since, Mom may be reading these, I won't even say. Okay, she's probably not. What I'm gonna do is make a fake Myspace, make a fake name, make a fake picture, like maybe of one of my old dolls or something, and then I'll post my songs. Good idea, right? Right! Good job, Jasmine! You're soooo smart! Ok, g2g!
xoxoxo~♥~
FUCK!

Sunday, December 28, 2008

caution, explicit

Wooot! She said okies!
To going to Little Tokyo, that is. Actually.... I'm not too thrilled about it. I don't want to hang out with TiTi the Bitititch and Mr. Bi-tch for hours! But now I have to. Wonderful. You know, Jade's friends are really not very nice at all. Sure, they're civil to me and Zac, but they're not friendly! Plus, Jade always ignores me once they come into the vicinity. Lovely, a whole day of ignore vous. That's not a good way to start the new year! I mean, it's really stupid, but I have this superstition that whatever you do on the first day will determine the rest of the year. And do I want my year to have me ignorado-ed in it? NO! But, hmm, this year I will be going to public school for the first time. Maybe I should kick start that with hanging out with my homies. NOOOOO! They are NOT my homies! My homies are people like JK and Crystal, people I can trust! Wait, JK? Did I just write that? Yes, yes I did. No, I don't have a crush on him! Why would I? I don't!! His mom is a complete nutbar!
At any rate. I don't want to hang out with The Mean Ones Of The School all day. Buuuuut, for Kitty's sake, I guess I have no choice. Why does Jade want me along anyway? I mean, since she has her cool friends to keep her company, why does she need a homeschooled preppy loser like me? Get a brain overhaul, girl! You don't want me along, say so! Don't just try to imply it, or kill me with kindness! You don't like me, drop me! Shoot. I doooooon't wanna do this.
I'm listening to Eh Eh by Lady GaGa right now. It's the only one of hers I like. For some reason, the rest of them bug me. I don't know why... Especially Poker Face. I think it may be her ridiculous sluttiness, but I don't know.
Eh eh. Nothin else I can say.
I think Jade is lucky, even though all her boys break her heart, she at least had a bf. You know, someone to make out with, etc. I don't, and that sucks! I really want one!
Oh, and if any of you fucking losers reading this decide that you want to stalk me and get with me, don't you dare even try. I can call the police faster than you can do yourself, dickhead. And I'm not afraid to get a restraining order against you. I can go to court, or whatever I need to get safe again from you so get the hell out of my life right now, damn stinkin shit sucking cock head asshole!
Ok, now that's out of the way. Sorry for all of you who dislike the strong language. I know it's very shocking to your refined sensiblities, but imagine how much more shocking it would be for an innocent girl like me to get taken off by some dipshit bastard with his pants down! I mean! Wouldn't that hurt you worse than ever?
Of course, than, a cute gangsta exactly my age would come in and rescue me, but it's best not to take chances.
Oh yeah, fyi, I am a second degree black belt.
No, I don't think I will make a fake Myspace so I can promote my songs like Colbie Caillat! I'm too frickin mad! Also, Kitty's sitting right here, and she won't leave, so I can't really. Plus, it's hard to think up fake names. I know, because I've tried.
Maybe I will later, but for now I'm sooooo mad I can't sit still!
Oh right, the rents are home, so I can't drown my sorrows with a loud dose of Paramore.
SHIT!


xxxxx~♥~

Saturday, December 27, 2008

...and a happy new year!

Christmas was soooooooo fun!!!! I got two goooooooooood pressies! Unfortunately, the rest of them weren't all that great. But these two should make up for that. Guess what they were? A iPod touch and a new cell phone!!!!! Uwahhhh! We so rich! Actually, no, Mom got the ipod free with her laptop at work, and Halmoni got the phones for us. And I do have to share it with everyone after all. But Dad and Mom got their own ones... And anyways, it is a picture phone! I'm soooooo happy! I also got some manga. So did Kitty. Zac, the Enlightned One, got a gray and white book, entiteld "Practical Economics In One Lesson" by some dude whos name I can't pronounce. Woooowwwww.... They don't call him a nerdy turdy for nothing...
Oh crap, I still have to ask Mom if I can go to Little Tokyo for New Years with Jade!!!!! Darn! I don't wanna hang out with The Goose Girl and Little Boy Bi!!!! What if I have to go and sit next to them and Jade thinks I should get to know TiTi better or some absolute crap like that so she sends me off with her and Mr. Gay and I have to put up with them the whole day and then I meet a really cute guy and he doesn't want to fall in lurrrrrve with me because of them oh CRUD they're worse than my freaky PARENTS!!!!!
Darn! I'mma just tell her Mom said no.
But what if that Dissapoints Her Beyond Words? What will I do then? I don't want to be responsible for depression! Especially since I'm not responsible for too much else! Hmmm.... Should I just go on and ask then? Or should I wait until the absolute last minni like I did with her party? I forgot, and when Jade mentioned it the day before, Mom flipped. She did let me go, though. Hmmmm....Maybe I can tell her Mom is thinking about it, and then tell Mom. Then Mom really will think about it, and she won't make up her mind until the day of! What this would accomplish, I'm not quite sure, but it would be better than...
DARN! I'm totally getting the Cold Sick Lump in my stomach thinking about going! I only get that when something really totally sucks beyond words! Like freaky W.W, or Princess Charming TiTi. I guess....I shouldn't go? Or should I? I'm getting bad vibes. YAAAAAAAHHHHHH! Did I just say "Vibes"? BEYOND lame! EW! Anyways. Mom and Dad (and Zac) don't appear to like Jade much. I mean, Mom thinks she's ok, and Dad doesn't care one way or the other, but Zac dislikes her baaaaaad, which may have something to do with the fact that she knows his weak points and always takes advantage of them. Which is not nice. Nor does it promote romance for either party. I mean, girl! Can't you conceal your crush any better? Not that she likes him anymore, but you know, she used to, which were sad days for me, indeed. Neither one would talk to me when we all hung out. I don't think he liked her, though. I mean, he used to like Cassidy Maler, and they're about as opposite as possible! I'm not saying Jade is a bad person, I'm just saying they're different. She never wears skirts, and Cassidy never wears pants. Jade is soooooo into her school (even though she's not a prep) (EWWWW I now despise that word) and Cass is homeschooled. Cass is involved in everything (at least everything that's useful, she and her brother both, as Mom says, how can there be an event in town, not involving the Maler's?) and Jade... I feel bad sayong it, but she's kind of on the outside. So they're quite different. I wonder which one will get the guy? Hmmmmm.... In manga, it would be the tough one, namely Jade, but in real life, I don't know.... And he did like Cassidy.
Oh, and speaking of lurrrrrrve! What about my love life? When the heck will I get a boyfriend? (I know, frumpy, but at least I didn't say "when in the world?") (Sungmin says that, though.) Today, as I was wearing a frumpi, nonmatching shawl over my dress (I knowww, so OUT! But Mom made me wear it), I ran into ♥♥Roman♥♥ and Austin, two cuties from Church Orch. Austin waved and said hi, Roman didn't. And he's the one I have a crush on! Although, he did smile and look my way a bit... Whyohwhyohwhyohwhy must all my crushes be so darn THICK?????!!!! None of them respond to my flirting, and yet total strangers do. Maybe it's my haircut. Maybe it attracts boys, and then sends them away. It is freakin ugly. Or maybe it's The Slut Campaign at work. See, because of Ilene (and people like her) and TiTi (and "people" like her) I've started what I call the Slut Campaign to bring honor to homeschoolers. I feel really awkward around everyone, because of frickin homeschooling, so I've started dressing like a Barbie doll to... eh, well, I don't know, but I think it helps you. Or me. Or whatever. It shows that even if I'm as lush as a field of clover, at least I'm not a nerdy turdy little homeschooler. I'm just flirty.
And dirty. I think it's ok, isn't it? I mean, this homeschool thing, it's my own damn fault! I should have kicked up a fuss long ago and forced Mom and Dad to send me to school. Or, failing that, I could have made up elaborate stories about the private school I attend, one with the creme de la creme crying at the doors trying to get on the loooooooooong waiting list. I could have even pretended to be like this with some Celeb'Kids! But noooooo.... Thinking that honesty is indeed the best policy, I told everyone where I actually live and die, and now, being good little citizens, they shy away from the girl under house arrest. It's frickin STUPID! I mean, we're all freakin PEOPLE, right? Why do we have to treat other people differently just because they don't look or act like you? Why do preps get judged more than sluts? Or, why do sluts get judjed more than preps? It's not fair! We should just try to...er.... love each other....
Or, I don't know, all get together and snort crack or something! We just need to be accepted the way we are! Woah, where did that come from? I didn't mean to go give a profound-zen-get-together-and-hug speech! I... uh....
Ok. Anyways. Yes. As we were saying. If I get kidnapped or raped or something, as a result of dressing like an overcooked tart, I'll cry out with every breath as I issue my restraining order (which may prove difficult to do) "It's all because I'm homeschooled! It's all because I'm homeschooled!" And it is. Because, since I can't belong, I might as well be strong! Right! Not that being strong generally involves dressing like a teenage Pussycat Doll, but you know, to each her own. It may improve my self-esteem. I don't yet know.
Oh, but should I cake on the makeup too? Or should I just go with the traditional apple bottom jeans, boots with the fur, etcetera? Maybe a bit of lipstick and some mascara... and since we're on the subject, some eyeshadow couldn't really hurt, could it? And maybe some gloss over the lipstick to make it prettier? Even sluts have to look nice, you know. How else do they get the tickets to their cock fights?
Ooooohh, speaking of that! One time Sungmin said, "Ok! Mount your stallion!" And I just was standing their going, "er. Oh. Um. Ok." Vair, vair funny.
Ok, back on subject. (Since Mom is in the kitch having a snackie, I don't dare let up typing for a minute, lest she come to see. Then, I could just hide it. She does know about the other blog, which is why I started this one, but if she suspects I got a new one....
I made a new email to go with it, so that she won't find it by checking my old email for me, which she sometimes does, but I think she could easily find it in history, which is why I log out each time. For further safety, I changed my login password too. It really was dumb to start up my other blog on the same email address. Of course she'd find it! I am such an idiot! An idiot with helicoptor parents. Or, to be accurate, parent. Dad doesn't give a rat's ass what I do, as long as it doesn't involve him in any way. Or, involve skimpy clothing... Or makeup... Hmm. The Slut Campaign may have a hard time continuing.
Oh well, at any rate, if Mom finds this blog, I may confront her. Or... Oh, heck, who cares. She's my mom. I'll just make a new blog and a new email address. You have to take care of parents, you know. Not let them get hurt or embarrassed, because if they do, who are they gonna turn to? They don't have the Tough Skin Of Youth, right? They just have the Psychologists Of Middle Age. Oh, and that makes me think of something else! I think adults get so depressed because they finally have their dreams! All your life, you know, you're looking forward to your dreams, whatever they are, like, a new house, or a bf, whatever. And then, you get it, so you don't have anything to look forward to anymore, so you lose your hope, and you get depressed, even though you have what you wanted in the first place! It's weird, isn't it? But I think it's true. Doesn't it seem like the happiest people are still waiting for something? Like, maybe they're engaged, or they're (ick) preggie, or they have a new job... you know. But then, after you get your dreams, you fall apart and spend all your hard earned cash on the psychologists. It's so stupid! We should just find something to look forward to about each day! Then we can be happier, can't we? Or we could look forward to going to heaven at the end. Although I know lots of Christians who look forward to that and they're still depressed. Wonder why? It seems like it should be the best thing....?
Cruddy wuddy muffin studdy, we have a fxckin gig tonight at the frickin Geezer Mansion! I don't wanna go! I'll get all infected with Geezer-itis! And Zac is gonna play cello.
I'd rather sit around philosophizing all night...
Wait... philosophying... I am SO hoping Mom doesn't see this now!!!!!!


xoxoxoxo~♥~

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

when the animals talk at midnight...

...I totally intend to listen.
Merry Christmas Eve! Actually, since I probably won't get to blog tomorrow, Merry Christmas!
We went to my recital today. I totally played sooooo good! Not that I wanted to admit it to anyone, so I just was like (to mom and dad) "eh, i played ok. Nothin special." Of course, they soon forgot and moved onto other matters, such as Zac's-uhhhh, I forget what it was, but it was something. I don't really feel comfy talking about myself, though. Don't know why. It's better to talk about someone else. Like TiTi the Bitch Of Nations. Nyaaaahhhhh! She has such dirty hair, she could single split-endedly keep Pantene in business! She stinks so bad that as soon as you get in a three mile radius, you can tell who's coming! Her clothes are so horrible, she must have gotten them from Boutique Chic, i.e the friendly local neighborhood Goodwill! Her books are so stoopid it's no wonder she had to repeat eighth grade! Well, sorry. That's enough of that. No more dissin. Just kissin! Come on, I got the mistletoe, where are you my cute-sweet-korean-gangsta-who's-exactly-my-age-and-plays-percussion-or-cello? Actually, I don't got the mistletoe, but that doesn't matter. We'll just have to go without, won't we....♥ mmm...
Come on! I need a cutie! (and I don't mean the tangerines!) I wanna bf? Why can't anyone see that? Can't someone just go buy me one at Best Buy for Christmas? Awwwwwww, so cute...
Annnyways! What the heck am I going on about anyways? I'm just babbling. Which is ok, seeing as this is my private babbling site, but still. It's not good practice.
Mom cut my hair yesterday, it's waaaay too frickin short! I look like my friend Elizabeth! (You judge if this is good or bad) The good thing is that now it curls by itself, and it also looks really cute in ponytails, which I always wear, so that's goooooood. I guess. But it's too frickin short!
Dad was being a real asshole about it, actually, yelling at Mom that she hasn't cut her hair in fifteen years and he has to suffer it and she's a bitch, blah blah blah. No, he didn't say bitch. And she has cut her hair! I have the pics to prove it! Seriously, he's so annoying I wrote a song just for him. I called it "In His Own Way." It's such a very kind song! It lists his attributes, such as demanding, controlling, crude, annoying, nasty, selfish, and rude. As I said, I was pissed when I wrote it, so it might not be accurate. But I'm pretty sure it is.
We've had about fourteen "gigs" this season (Christmas). I didn't play in all of them, of course, but Zac did. Err...I think he did. Yup. Except for some of them. I know, I know, couldn't I have said that first? The truth is, this is my blog, so if you don't like it, that's tough.
Mom was proudly counting them up after my recital, and oh yeah, speaking of recital! My outfit was super kawaii! It was... dark blue skinny jeans (that unfortunately got ripped at both knees), a bright (no, bright! Like, REALLY bright!) yellow Miss Me hoodie that oddly enough looks really good on me, bright red peep toe pumps, a yellow and white Ann Taylor purse, low ponytails, and that hematite bracelet I got at the farmer's market. It was sooooo Hollywood! I lurrved it! Except my feet kinda hurt from the pumps after awhile.
Darn, it's dinnertime. Mom made tamales! Yum!
Byeas!
xoxoxoxo~♥~

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

i thought i had some news, too!

Awww MAN! I never get to blog! Now that Zac is finally working on his college apps, and Dad is installing a new disc drive (or maybe hard drive-anyways, it's called Pomegranate, as he likes to name everything after his wonderful fruit trees, for some reason he didn't like the name Ichigo. Wonder why?) Anyways, now that Zac is finally deigning to work on the entrance key to the rest of his life (don't you agree that bi-kwon-do is way more imprtant?), for some reason, he finds it necassary to keep both computers easily within his reach. No, he doesn't take the iMac up to his room. It's called a figure of speech.
OOOOOOOOOHH DARN IT! I'm still pissed at The Bitch Without Name, i.e TiTi. I even painted my nails pink and black, alternating. SCREW what she thinks, I like pink and that's final! It doesn't make me a prep! It just makes me capable of kicking your fat ass! (TiTi) Not that she's fat. Or that I would actually do that. Or that the sentence even makes sense. But that's life, is it not?
Oh man, I feel like a total loser, typing away on this loserish blog with no one to read it (except probably Mom, who is even now sitting in her office, chuckling in spite)
Hmm, Pomegranate made a very odd sound, sort of like it wanted to die, but it lacked the proper appliances, so it was just sort of collapsing on it's feet. I swear! I didn't touch it! It wasn't me! *Crash*
No, I know I break 99% of everything that gets broken in the house, but I'm not a ditz! Seriously! I have da skillz, man. Skillz enough to get slammed by Ms. Pathetic Cow. Lovely.
But really! Why the heck is Jade hanging out with Robot and Hydrochloric Acid anyways? I would think she would have enough problems of her own, what with her love life (always unrequited) and her parents. (Heck NO you voyeur! I am NOT spilling my best friend's personal life all over the web! Shut UP!) I mean, does she need to make it worse for herself by going out with Meanie and Unfeelie? Very odd. Very odd indeed. Oh, and when you consider the rest of her gang, you might actually think that Zac and me are the most normal of all of them! Like, for example, Mr. Bi Boy. He... um... likes Zac. End of story. Actually, more than that, because parts of the story are trés trés amusante. Like when Zac snuck into the school with him, and everyone assumed they were together. Or when we went to her party, and he couldn't keep his eyes off The Brother Of Woes. (At least he's in woe right now, judging from the groans emitting from his bedroom) (and when I can hear them a house away, that's pretty woeful). But seriously folks... I am so totally hoping that Mr. Bi Boy and Little Miss Sunshine (NOT) won't come with us for New Years! What would you do, stuck in a guzzle-bus between a trash talking sleaze and Flirty McGay? I think I would die, that's what I would do. NO Kitty you CANNOT have the computer! I'll quit when I'm good and ready! (There goes Pomegranate again. Maybe she is dying, as we bought her at a yard sale yesterday, for apparently quite cheap.) Shoot! I still need to ask Mom if I can frickin GO to New Years! Jade'll be pissed if I don't ask...Hmm...but I need to soon, or New Years'll be over before I can open my mouth. I'm half hoping I can't go, actually. I don't wanna hang out with the candidates for The Addam's Family! Why would I like that? And, of course, Jade will be slamming on Zac (someone should tell her that's not how to get a guy!) like always, and he'll come home pissed and depressed. Lovely. Maybe Mom and Dad will say no.
Oh, great, here comes the dad himself, wanting to watch some crappy vid on Youtube! If I know him, it's about how to do an effective crotch grab in street fighting, set to the tune of Yankee Doodle by Ron Paul himself. And no, Dad isn't a perv or anything, he just likes martial arts. Which may come to the same thing.
But as I was saying....
I don't know!
We have had lots of perfromances, or "gigs" as Mom so charmingly calls them, in the past week or so. Yesterday I even got to sing I Wonder As I Wander! My first vocal performance! Woot! Helloooooo Hollywood! The only catch> The only people attending the concert were the ones who were actually performing, thereby making the chance of a talent scout being there fairly small, although two people (singers!!!!!) did say I had a "beautiful" voice and they "enjoyed it very much". Well! Sweetie! Here comes the red carrrrpet!
Oh yeah, one of the guinea pigs had a baby. We can't figure out whose it is, though.
It's brown and black. Muy adorable.
Like The Puppy.
Who I won't get to see until January.
Crud.
KITTY, GO AWAY!
I thought I had some other news too... Wellep, we got a tree. It's about on par with Charlie Brown's. Don't you envy me?
Oh yeah, now I remember my newsy news! I got into Annie's Mailbox with my letter about what to do with an abusive boyfriend fifteen hundred miles away! It's called, "Didn't Mean To Two Time". Don't you love how I used old fashioned language there? I think it's sooooooo good! *pats self on back.* Mwah! Air kiss! Air kiss! Kiis FM on air! ♥
I guess that's enough TiTi bashing for today. I'll update later, when I can.
See you in college! (presumably I'll have my own pink macbook by then.)

xoxoxo~♥~

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

stillpisseddang!

That's what you get when you let your heart win...
CRUD!!!!!! Thanks to our dear kindhearted TiTi, Paramore is now my favorite band. I also like Linkin Park and M.I.A. Don't worry, though, I won't start liking Metallica (ick!) or Guns'N'Roses. The Puppy likes Metallica, or at least, he was wearing a metallica tee. Grr! The dude may be cute as heck, but he has no taste in music. Did you hear Metallica's latest song? It sucks!
Ok, now I'm listening to Decode. I really want to frickin watch Twighlight! Jade invited me to go watch it with her, but mom wouldn't let me. She looked it up on Wiki, and she deemed it too scary for her preciouslly sensitive daughter. Actually, now that you think of it, this may be a good thing, as probably Jade would have invited Jannelle and Ms. Wannabe TiTi. Really, the girl has no taste in friends. Would you want to daily hang out with a robot and Cruella Deville? No, I didn't think so. Yet poor Jade, she always talks to them, hangs with them, sits with them at lunch. Indeed, she is the most self sacrificng person I have ever had the pleasure to make fun of. I guess it's really not very nice to talk about Jade behind her back, since she's my best friend, but I can talk about TiTi as much as I want! Ha ha! TiTi is freakin annoying. I wish she would go somewhere else other than Redlands High next year. Maybe she should be homeschooled so she can see how much of a crap thing it is. Yeah, that would be funny! I meet TiTi and Jannelle in Barnes and Nobles with Jade and Kitty, and I say sooooooo sweetly, "I didn't see you in school! Where are you going?" TiTi shifts uncomfortably. She looks up and down and side to side. She clears her throat, then mumbles something. "Pardon?" I say, smiling like Medusa. "Er...homeshcooled." she mutters, blushing hard. "Eeeeee! Jade, save us! It's a prep! It's a loser!! Run! She's a wannabe! She'll destry us all! It's a freakin prep!" *cracks up*
AHHHHHHHH that would be so frickin funny!
Unfortunately, TiTi doesn't seem to be the kind of person who's parents would put her under house arrest. Cardiac arrest, maybe, but not homeschooling. They're not that cruel.
I lurrrve Misery Business! It's so good! I am so gonna buy it. I'mma also get Pressure and That's What You Get. I don't know what else. Who cares. I don't really like Metro Station. I like Shake it though.
Darn, dad wants to read to us from Nat Dough-Bitch. Dang! G2g!

xoxoxo~♥~

Monday, December 15, 2008

grrr! still pissed!

Holla holla! It is I!
What was I complaining about last time? Oh yeah. TiTi the wannaBeBe. Seriously, who names their kid "TiTi"? It's like Bambi or something! And Jannelle has a (semi) normal name! Maybe it's because they sensed her malevolence at birth and gave her a cutesy name to counteract this. If you ask me, it didn't work all that well, but hey, maybe I'm wrong.
What is her problem anyways? Who peed in her espresso? I don't know why anyone would be mean to anyone they just met who you could presumably hang out with in later years if you really like each other. And, someone like her, I'm thinking, would really need friends, as, with her looks alone, she could put off many an intrepid soul. Maybe she has an inferiority complex due to flunking eighth grade. Although she seemed quite proud of it. I dunno. CRUD! I need to frickin change the bird seed which I forgot to do for several days!!!! Brb. ><
Okies, I'm back.
TiTi is one of those rare and delightful people who think that everything should change in accordance to them and anyone who doesn't should be the outcast of society. Fortunately, there are enough sane people who make people like her the outcasts of society, which takes care of it nicely. Therefore, prehaps in retaliation, people like TiTi have to become even meaner and try to undermine anything they can. My friend Elizabeth is a little bit like that, but she can also be nice. (Actually, so is my friend Selene, who tortures her sister Karina constantly.) (Karina is older)
TiTi is soooooooooo annoying! Really, much worse than Jade is to Zac (and that's pretty bad! Someone should tell her that you don't get guys by being mean to them). I wish I could have lost all sense of social propriety and said a few things, but I didn't really. Cause I'm so "sheltered" as Jade quite kindly put it. Ergh, she doesn't need to be mean to me to get her friends to like her! Is she just using me? Darn. I'm like a spongey thingie that people use to clean toilets, i.e always being used. Yup, that's Jasmine, the neighborhood loser! Go and take advantage of her, why don't you? The sooner I get discovered by a talent scout and taken off to Hollywood, the better. Then people will have to at least be polite to me. I mean please! Would you call Gwen Stefani a loser or a prep? Well, ok, TiTi might, as she probably likes Amy Lee or (snort) Indigo Girls. Ya know what? She probably does! That's hilarious! What a weirdo! Chaaa!
I'm listening to That's What You Get right now. I actually like Paramore, mostly. Yeah, what of it? Huh? (Oh yeah, I need to go take the cake out. brb.)
dad wants to read to us from Carry On Mr. Dough-Bitch. Darn it! I SO don't want to! Can't he some other time????! Crud, I suppose we have to now. Seeyas all later! (after I eat that cake I made!) It's raining, suh-weet!

xoxoxo~♥~

Sunday, December 14, 2008

i am not a prep!!!!!!!!

I have so much to write about! So I won't write about any of it! Make sense? Hey, why won't Youtube go? I'm trying to do Misery Business. And it won't load. Very annoying.
Yesterday I hung out with Jade at Barens and Nobles which was really fun. I got a strawberry cream frappucino with whipped cream the only problem being that now I had to treat Kitty to a vanilla frappucino. She had so better pay me back. Jade is borderline obsessed with anime and manga, ignoring things like Fruits Basket and Kitchen Princess for things with titles like Hell Girl and Hellsing. Very uplifting, no? And, even worse, she's gotten Kitty hooked on Death Note. Wonderful. The only thing worse than having a sister who pretends everything is a giant sword, is a sister who pretends she can kill people by writing their names in a handy-dandy little notebook, dropped by a mega hideous monster. I mean! What if she goes over the top and starts writing peoples' names in my notebooks, declaring that they will soon die? Lovely. Soon she will start to cosplay.
This was all very fun, and I think Kitty started liking Jade more (Jade likes Kitty, most people do; wrongly believing her to be adorable). until Jade's weird friend snd her even weirder sister showed up. Jannelle and TiTi were so emo they hurt my eyes. Jannelle isn't really weird, but she is a bit emotionless, rather like a robot. SHe seems to be the kind of person, that, when pushed far enough, would trade her blue and black anime shirt for an orange jumpsuit and resort to hours of community service to atone for her crimes. Scaryyyyy....
Then, her sis. TiTi is soooooooo annoying it's not even funny. Jade tried to introduce her to me and Kitty, and all the girl did was go, "Hi" so quickly it was more like "h" and then turn around to gosspi loudly with her sister. Then, when some kind person told her we was homeschooled, she cracked up and called us preps, losers, and wannabes. Excuuuuse me, but isn't that just a little hypocritical coming from you? (Except for the prep part, of course). I mean, the chick was
1. repeating eighth grade because (as Jade said) she's not the sharpest razor blade in the emo person's house
2. dressed in the most hideous clothes you have ever seen. They were'nt quite punk-o, and they weren't quite emo, but they certainly were dirty and hideously frumpy.
3. had the greasiest hair I have ever seen on a living human being. It looked like her last shower had been when she was five years old.
4. had the most annoying laugh I've ever seen. Try high, loud, and maniacal.
5. was reading a book called "Take Me There" with a picture on the cover of two people sitting in an airport, looking deep and intently into each other's eyes.
All together, these signs spell out loudly and clearly, "wann-a-be"!
Very annoying.
Is high school full of people like this? And why does Jade even like them anyways? I sincerely hope that they're not coming with to Little Tokyo for New Years. (Which, I still need to ask Mom if I can go)
Oh darn, I need to go get ready for a singing in the House Of Geezers. Lovely.
Seeya!

xoxoxo~♥~

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

figured out!

I figured it out!
What have I figured out, you may ask? That is a very good question.
What I have figured out is very important and all. Ok, since you insist, I'll cut the crap and tell you since you're so demanding. Man!
I figured out what the Voice-Of-Doom is!
It's because JK is living in his car and he wrecked his car.
Who is JK? He is a boy in our CKC-Music outreach, and he's only a bit older than me. Why he has such an odd name, I cannot explain. We may only assume that his mom has a mean streak. He's in eighth grade too, but he's (apparently) fourteen. He also isn't bad looking. NOOOOO! I do NOT have a frickin crush on him!!!! Even though I like to talk to him. And I think he's cute. And the best violin student we have. BUT I DON'T HAVE A FREAKING CRUSH ON HIM! YEEESH!
He's apparently living in his car (his whole family is, and although I have never seen his dad, we may assume he has one, which would be vair, vair crowded in their little old Toyota Camry.)
So now, apparnetly they've wrecked their car. Poor boy, he has nowhere to live. NO, I DON'T WANT HIM TO MOVE IN WITH US!!!! YEEESH! What will they do? I mean, you can't exactly camp outside sobre la playas, as it gets quite cold as of nights now that it's December. You cant also go up to a random person and ask to stay in their garage either. Maybe they can stay in their car even if it's wrecked? But then it might leak gas fumes and be dangerous to their healths. Which would make it an unsuitable home for children.
Maybe they can go into a mall or something and stay in there, hiding in the lingerie department until closing, then make a break for it and sleep in those yummy, puffy, squishy beds in the Bed, Bath, And Beyond section that you always want to jump on. They could eat food from the food court, and get clothes from Hollister or Aeropostale, in case their clothes got damaged in the wreck. They could get toothbrushes, soap, lotion, exfoliaters, toners, lip balm, and everything else from the health section, and makeup from the beauty parlor. The they could get massages on those chairs. That would be soooooo fun! All completely illegal, of course.
But if you're strapped for cash...
Ohpiedoppeee, it's dinner time. (We eat late). Better go-I'll write about JK more later!
xoxoxo~♥~

emo-ness indeed

KYAHHH!! I got to stay home alone! Er, with the babyshitters, but they don't count as they are so not the shit.
I was on facebook, and I found this application where your friends answer questions about you. Looked at what they said about me and what did it say? Do You Think Jasmine Is Pretty? NO! Do You Think Jasmine Is Sweet? NO! Do You Think Jasmine Is Confident? NO! Well, really! I'm so glad I have such supportive friends.
The one who said I'm not pretty was a boy. Now who might that one be? Who do you think...?
I have a couple of guy friends, but most of them while away their time staring at my chest, so I don't know if they really know what I look like above the neck at all. Maybe it was someone who saw my picture and thought I was my friend Jade. She's pretty enough, but for all of those uncivilized Ohio people, she's probably just too Asian. Who could it be? I could technically find out, but I don't want to, as it might be my crush ♥Roman♥ the ♥cutie♥. I've had a crush on him ever since sixth grade, and he's been ignoring me since sixth grade. He's Zac's friend, and the pastor's son, which gives you a pretty nice idea of his personality. Actually, I like his personality. He's hyper like me. ♥
Still pissed. Why am I not sweet? I try to be nice! I can't help it if the person I'm currently conversing with happens to be the sluttiest slut in the world! Even then, I don't let it show. I act like their best friend. I bet it was Ilene who said that. She used to be my best (and only) orchestra friend, but now she is finding it hard to be civil to me. She is also probably the one who thinks I'm not confident. Right now, she is probably answering such kindhearted questions such as, "Do you think your friend Jasmine is cute and sexy and could rule the world?" with an emphatic "NO!"
Ahhh, well, I will not let that get me down! It's all behind me now! I got to sing my songs! Lalalala. I hear nothing ugly and harsh. Lalalala I'm off to La-La Land. (If I'm not there already)
Everyone, especially Kitty and Sungmin, are very pissed at me because I didn't vook any desserts for when they came back from tae kwon dog doo. Well, how was I to know they were'nt getting ice cream like they'd said? How was I to know that I was too busy singing and practicing (although I did that for like ten mins) to cook any extraneous cake? Besides, Halmoni brought over that cheesecake. Isn't that enough? Why am I so whiny? I didn't make it, now they're mad. Plain and simple. And, oh yeah, I kinda said I would so this is all my fault after all. Wonderful, Jasmine.
Right now, I have my something-awful-is-about-to-happen-or-has-already-happened feeling on. I wonder why? I don't think anything awful is going to happen. Is it? Before the You-May-Not-Watch-Music-Videos-Because-They-Are-Gay talk, I sorta had the feeling a few hours in advance. Sooooo, what do you think will happen? Will Roman and The Puppy show up at my house both proclaiming that they hate me with all their hearts? Or maybe a cute boy will stagger up to my doorstep, hand me a knife, then drop dead, just as the police come roaring up the street. Nooooo! Not a cute boy! Couldn't stand that happening! Okay, an oooooogly boy from the planet of MegaUgliness. Much better. Oh, and he's a jerk too.
Still have the feeling. So thick you could cut it with a knife. So strong you could use it to rip a telephone book in half (and why you would want to do this, I don't know, as telephone books are generally quite useful if, like most of us, you don't have a knowledge of the phone numbers of everyone in a square mile radius.) (or maybe more-I never claimed to be Ramanujan.).
Still have the feeling.
What the heck is going to happen????!!!!!!! The suspense is slowly killing me.
Maybe it's because everyone's dissing me on F.B. That may have something to do with it. I didn't know I was so sensitive! Woooowwww, we learn new things each day.
Or maybe cause everyone's pissed at me. They usually are, however, so I don't think this could have much to do with it.
I feel like a frickin freak.
Because I'm homeschooled.
And because of people like Ilene.
My life will now be miserable and sad.
Because of people like Ilene.
And because I am homeschooled.
I will die miserable and alone.
With people saying things like
"She was not confident!"
"She was not sweet!"
And above all...
"She was not even pretty!"
ANd all hearts will weep.
The end.
Ok, now I feel like much, much more of a freak. Going on about my funeral? Saying I'm miserable because of my so-called friend? (Well, I probably am) I must be turning emo.
Crud. I really hate black.


xoxoxo~♥~

boring boring boirng

Yes, indeed, Kitty is currently listening to Buttons by the Pussycat Dolls, and also watching various anime couples all on the laptop because Dad is not in the house as of right now. Very annoying.
She's now listening to When i Grow Up, and even though I lurve the song, I'm going to listen to my own music, namely Eh Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say) by Lady GaGa. It's the only one of her songs I like. The rest of them are just really irritating for some reason. Dunno why...Kitty likes her. But anyways, as I was not saying, today is bound to be another spectacularly borink day. Oh joy and delight. If you read my diary (which you had better not, on pain of death, but if you did) all you'd see for several days would be a steady stream of haiku denouncing boring days to the death. Soooooo not Anne Frank. But then again, I never claimed to be Anne Frank, even though we are roughly the same age. For one thing, I do not have a boyfriend. For another thing, I am not Polish, also to the best of my knowledge, I'm not currently housing with a variety of dysfunctional people who all are out to get me, more or less. But other than that, am I not identical? No, I am not. Correct answer, dear.
I sooooo hate boringness. That's why I want to go to a public high school, so I won't have to face daily tedium and mortification. Another point is that I actually want to graduate from college, and this is difficult when one is under house arrest until age eighteen. Another point (the most important) is that I want a boyfriend and I want to go to the prom! Call me shallow, but I want to dress up like Cinderella and go to the ball. Maybe I'll even find Prince Charming! ♥
Seriously, in Goodwill (sooooo chic, I know!) I saw this gorgiousioso burnt orange strapless gown that was soooooooooo me! I lurrrrrrved it to death! It looked good on me, even though I usually look horrible in orange. It had this swirly skirt! And, it was made out of the silkiest silk evaaaaaa! I lurrved it! And I...didn't get it. Crud. Welcome to my life.
Probably some highly dysfunctional four year old has bought it by now to make a smock for art class. Or maybe some John Bitch (eh. Birch. My bad.) inspired house wife has brought it home to make curtains for the front parlor windows. (What the heck is a parlor anyways?)
Waaaahhhhh! I'm crying!
Oh well, who cares. Plenty of Gucci out there. (Gucci! Ha! Oh, I'm so funny. So funny I forgot to laugh.)
Even though it must suck to have a jerk boyfriend, still you're lucky you have someone at all. I still await my first kiss. And you know who should give it to me? Yes, you're right! My darling Puppy! He has to! Maybe at the end of the concert, he'll come over and tell me that he truly loves me deep in his heart and he wants to be my boyfriend! ♥ Uwah! Kyah! Chihuahua! I'mma get a bf!!!!! ♥
Sungmin, shut up. Thou art a brat of the highest standing.
Oh wonderful, Zac forgot when his lesson was and missed half of it so is now riding as fast as possible to campus with his violin on his bike. (I don't mean that his violin is riding, just that he has it). This is indeed the mind of Zac.
Crud, we have nothing to do today! Boring! Boring! Boring! This also means Kitty will be watching inordinate amounts of Bleach and Sailor Moon on Youtube. Lovely, my sister is a music videot. (Although, they're not really music videos persay...) (And, if you really want to go into detail, I guess I would be somewhat of a music videot as well, but let's ignore that for the present, shall we?) Awww! The video for Right Here (Departed) is so nice!
Oh, there's one fig left. I must so kindly and thoughtfully eat it so it doesn't go to waste.
These days are as boring as summer, the only difference being that I like summer. I like winter too, but it's so darn boring! Crud!
On the bright side, Halmoni came over with blueberry cheesecake. I've already eaten three pieces, so today isn't entirely a waste.

xoxoxo~♥~

Monday, December 8, 2008

borink

You could put the blame on me...
Two days ago, when the parents gave me the No Music Vids talk, I wrote this song that's sooooo dramatic and awful. It's basically Sorry, Blame It On Me, except more dramatic.
Right now, Dad and Mom and Zac are out, which is incredibly boring and all. Kitty immediately went to the laptop to watch Bleach on Youtube, so I just went to blog here. It's not that I don't like Bleach, I do, but I don't like watching anime with Kitty. It's a pain. (Cool, "pain" rhymed with everything Akon was saying!) I'll watch it some other time. (When I can, is a mystery, as Kitty always has the laptop, 24/7, and I hardly ever get to stay home by myself, actually with the babysitters, but they don't really count. I call them the "babyshitters" behind their backs.)
I think Kitty is entirely way to obsessed with anime. Soon she will be dressing up in a blue and white sailor dress and declaring that she is the reincarnation of Queen Serenity. This will be embarassing, as she will most likely do it in a public place, say church or orchestra. (What other public places do we go?????)
I don't think I can go to hip hop today. For one thing, I hurt my knees yesterday, as I told you, and for another thing, it's in Claremont so I have to go with Zac and his friend Mark and carpool there and then wait around for rehearsal to end after I come back. and they moved it to 4:30 so I can't go as Mark will presumably be still in school when we have to leave. Did that make sense? If you are like my dad, it probably did not and you are now belligerant and confused. Well, I don't care. Am I writing for you? No, I am not. So please shut up and listen. Or don't listen. Whatever you do, just shut up.
Yup, she's watching Bleach. I heard a loud "Ichigo! Hyah!"
I want to go to hip hop! Darn! It's not that I want to hang around in Claremont for hours on end, it's just that I don't want to go to the library with Mom, Kitty, and Sungmin. Dang it, it's really annoying! For one thing, we have to walk there, about a mile, with cloth bags on our backs for carrying the books!!!!!!!!!!! Is that 1800's or what? Dang, I really hate going. And, if this isn't enough, once we get there, Sungmin, Kitty, and Mom proceed to overload on the precious resource of books, thus weighing down one lucky person: moi. I know, so unfair, right? They're the ones getting the books, so they should be the ones to carry them back. I don't mean that they give me all the books, cause if they did, I would probably die, but they do give me quite a few of them, on the presumption that since I'm a teenager, I must be freakishly strong and also be immune to embarrassment. They are correct on neither of these assumptions, as I'm actually pretty weak, and it embarrasses me just to be seen walking with them. Not only this, the librarians appear to sense that I'm not as fond of books as the rest of my family, so they glare at me like I'm a piece of crap they want to get off of their shoe. It's very embarrassing, Not only this, Mom won't let me get out 17 or Teen People, so I'm forced to read them right there which is also very embarrassing. So, to sum up, I hate going to the library. Any questions? Good.
Orchestra last night was soooo normal. Except that my crush was looking soooooooo hot! he was so frickin cute I could hardly keep my eyes on the music. Half the time I was looking at him anyway. I wanted to jump up and kiss him right then and there! Oooooohhhhhh soooooo hot! ♥ Seriously, he should be in Super Junior. He's that cuuuuuute! Except they already have a violinist, so I don't know if they would need a cellist too. But still!
Kitty is still watching, and I think she's on the 20'th or so episode and she only started yesterday. Dang. See what I mean by obsessed?
Once she gets obsessed with something, she never stops being obsessed until she gets tired of it. \g2g there back byeeeas!
xoxoxo ~♥~

Sunday, December 7, 2008

a monologue on boys

Owwie... I just fell down on the sidewalk and got scrapes on both my knees! It hurts like you will not BELIEVE! Ow! Dang...
See, I wasn't looking where I was going, so I drove my bike right off the curb by mistake. Now I'm bleeding like a lot (or at least I used to be) and it HURTS!!! Will I have to go to orchestra wearing shorts? Dang.
Still pissed at the parents not wanting me to listen to music. Still pissed that the parents think I'm gay. Still pissed I fell down on the sidewalk. Still pissed at the Xmen for being so dang dramatic all the time. Still pissed at Sungmin (my youngest brother) for being sick and infecting everything he touches including the sofa and the laptop. Still pissed that my shirt doesn't fit right and I like like a donkey. STILL PISSED ABOUT EVERYTHING!!!!!!
Dang it.
I wanna go to orchestra tonight, but I don't want to too. I know, that makes no sense, but for some reason, I don't wanna go right now. Maybe because I'm afraid my dream boy isn't actually as dreamy as I thought? I have a huge crush on one of the cellists in my orchestra. He's really cute, and looks like a baby doggie, so I call him The Puppy. He seems nice from what I've seen, but he really isn't much of a conversationalist. Last week I sat next to him to talk, and all he said was "Hi"! And he doesn't respond to my oh-so-excellent flirting!!! What's with him anyway? Dude got no social skills? I'm not really slutty, but I do love flirting with every boy I see, because... well, I just do. It's fun, and it really makes someone's day a little brighter when someone flirts with you. (Not that it's really ever happened to me-much) (Well, it did, but mostly from a boy who may or may not be gay, so it doesn't really count, now does it.) Also, there are about a million hot guys in my orchestra I can't wait to get to know! One of them is half Korean! ♥ but he plays trumpet, so I don't know how I'll ever get up to talk to him, or what my excuse will be. "Hi, sweetie! I think you're really hot! I know you don't know even my name, but do you wanna go out with me?" Yeah, that would work sooooo well. There's a really hot Korean boy sitting right next to me, and I used to talk to him a little, but he's kind of popular, and I'm afraid to talk to him a lot. Cause he's so cute, you know. I really feel like I don't deserve to talk to anyone, cause they don't like me, and they're all better than me anyhow. This may be true, but it really is no excuse for being miserable, so I should snap out of it and talk to my friends without being shy. I'm not very popular, but I do have some friends, and several people who say hi to me, and suchlike. (Is suchlike even a word?)
(Btw, "suchlike" isn't underlined in Spellcheck, and "slutty" is. What's the world coming to?)
I think my knees are hurting a little less now, but I can't be sure. Maybe I should wear a skirt to orchestra instead of shorts. I really do like skirts, as they're pretty and comfy, but they generally don't have pockets, which is annoying. ALso, they have the tendency to fly up and show one's panties, which can be a little embarassing if there is a boy present. I'm kind of a girlie girl I guess, liking pink and makeup and boys and all. In Ada (small town in Ohio where I lived for the first nine years of my life) I would have been appalled by my Barbie-like-ness. Actually, that was more in the Rental House (as Kitty and I so cleverly put it) where we lived for a year when we'd first moved to California. I was obsessed with the Amazons from Greek Mythology, and I would frequently dress up in short skirts and tops, waving around homemade bows, arrows, spears, and swords (usually made out of the all purpose sticks that dropped from our trees) and shout battle cries, thus alarming the neighbors who lived below us on the hill. (We were at the top of the hill).
Dad just came in, so I'm doing the old clear the screen trick, and pushing f=ll so nothing appears on the screen. It still types. I am indeed a computer genius. (laugh)
Note that it probably won't work on your computer, though.
Oh dang, my knees are hurting like fxck now, because I just went and changed the bird's food. I also have to hang up the laundry. It may be heroic and noble to not tell anyone it hurts, but it's deleterious in the long run, as you get swamped with chores.
I really should go hang up the laundry before Kitty comes back from hula class. Maybe mom will grant me mercy and let me not have to do anything else.
I don't really mind hanging up the laundry, because we hang it on the balcony of our house (the shame!) and it's one of the few places I can still sing undisturbed. (I mean that I'm undisturbed, not the neighbors, who have patiently and kindly put up with an earful from me several times a day.) (Sometimes I paint my nails up there too, and I sing while it's drying, to time it. One Kelly Clarkson song, one Rihanna song, one Avril Lavigne song, and Viva La Vida will harden even the most persistent gloppy coat.)
I need to go now, because Dad just woke up, and probably wants the computer, even though he is currently eating lunch. Parents. Can't live with em. (Especially if they are your best friend's parents, and not your own).

xoxoxo~h&earts;

Saturday, December 6, 2008

my parents think im gay

Well, maybe not really. But, listen to my sad and woeful tale and tell me what you think.
There I was, minding my own business, practicing my violin in the library, and ,y little sister Kitty walks in. She plays her scales, we're just minding our own business when the mom walks in. I knew right away something was up. In fact, I'd know since we went shopping earlier this evening that something bad was going to happen or had happened. Call it woman's intuition. Anyways, so she sits down on the floor, and says, ""Listen, girls, we need to have a talk about the videos you watch on Youtube." Yup, you guessed it. Every teenager's nightmare-the mom tries to talk to you about music. Basically, it was the music talk, don't watch anything unsuitable, etc etc, Dad saw something on the computer, etc. "Sheesh, don't worry, I'm not going to go to a porn site!" I informed Mom (In different language, though, lest I incur yet more wrath). THEn she left. Suddenly, we (me and Kitty) realized that Dad must have seen Colors by Utada Hikaru, which features two girls kissing. Lovely, eh? I deduced from this that they must think I'm gay too. (Not that Utada is...or I dunno...Hope not.) In other words, THEY THINK I'M GAY!!!!!!!!! I mean, honestly! I have about three different boys I'm crushing on! I still don't like I Kissed A Girl! I would want to get married if guys were'nt such assholes! I AM NOT GAY!!!!!!
And who would be my girlfriend? I mean, I never see frickin' people!!!!!!!
I WANT A BOYFRIEND!!!! SERIOUSLY!!!! I AM NORMAL!!!
I. AM. NORMAL!!!!
GOT IT??!!!!!!!

Sheesh.

first post, baby!

Hey! My name is Jasmine, and I'm almost fourteen years old! This is going to be my secert blog, where I can write everything as it really happens, and where I can whine in private without the whole world knowing. I can't wait to get started!
Ok, so some about me. I'm in eighth grade, but I'm homeschooled, which sucks dirty ass like you will not believe. It's so frickin lonely I always feel like I don't belong anywhere...dang annoying! I play violin, which I don't mind, except I hate practicing and taking lessons. I don't like classical music that much, as there is something supremely uninteresting about sitting in a concert hall with a whole bunch of quiet, well behaved fans, all waiting for the next pristine note.
Oh, speaking of that, Kiis FM Jingle Ball was today. I was so frickin disappointed that I couldn't go, I almost started crying! Instead, what did I get to do? Go volunteer at a community service outreach my mom started. At least there were some hot guys there.
Anyways, what was I saying? You don't really need to know all my musical history, but just so you don't get confused (like my dad), I play violin, viola, cello, piano, and guitar and I love singing. And, if I do say so myself, my voice isn't half bad! It's probably what I'm most talented at, as I kinda suck at classical, and teaching yourself is hard. I'm not saying I'm good at voice either-the parents won't let me take lessons. Actually, I've never asked, but I have asked for electric guitar and drum lessons and they wouldn't go for it.
I want to be a pop star, if you hadn't noticed.
For my favorites... Hmm, let's see.
Season: summer (but I like all of them)
Singer: Avril Lavigne, Katy Perry, Chris Brown, Super Junior, etc. (everyone)
Song: Pocketful of sunshine
Color: pink
Cosmetic: lip gloss (It's poppin!)
Animal: all of them (except the scary ones!)
Food: anything sweet, or else roasted chestnuts or sushi
Outfit: uh, I kinda have a lot, but maybe a short skirt, boots and a cute top, or else jeans and my pink Papaya or Miss Me shirt, chains in the pocko, purse, gloss, the works.
Perfume: anything fruity or floral (mostly). I love Mariah Carey's new one!
Drink: boba milk tea, duh!
Possession: mostly all of them.
Car: Lexus, Ferrarri, BMW, or Porsche, but it had better be pink!
Subject: Ohhhhhh, please don't ask me this one. I'd have to say Computer...
Book: any manga (mostly)
Type of person: A boy, naturally! Kidding! Ok, just a person, who's not creepy and who's nice.
Type of boy: Cute, sweet, funny, Asian (although my other crush is white as a sheet...) smooth, fairly popular, encouraging, and loves me a lot!
Game: Hearts, or maybe Poker.
Song on the top ten: Live Your Life (or Hot N Cold if its still on there)

Now my least favorites!
Season: don't have one
Singer: Lil Wayne
Song: Let It Rock by Kevin Rudolph feat. Lil Wayne
Color: navy blue/black
Car: Ford Prius/PT Loser (cruiser)/3-by-4
Animal: Dunno. Something icky and scary.
Food: Fish/oatmeal/cheese/eggs/oily beef tamales straight from the can
Cosmetic: Blush (I don't need it, as I blush enough for five of me)
Outfit: frumpy
Possession: dunno
Perfume: This sickly sweet, ickly, stickly perfume my mom has. EW!
Drink: Beer
Book: fantasy
Subject: Most of em, but mostly math.
Tyoe of person: mean, awkward, smelly, evil, dominating, thinks they're graet, crude, boorish, and ONE THAT CHEWS GROSSLY!!!!
Type of boy: See above. Or, for other example, check out Heartless by Kanye West. Ol' Kanye feelin a bit jerky...
Game: Thrift Shop, a game my brother Zac invented. (It sucks)
Song on the top ten: Heartless (although I do like it a bit)
Ohhh, g2g! We're going shopping! Later!
xoxoxo~♥~