ESL and AP (them's acronyms)

I finally got my AP scores, and let me tell you, it wasn't pretty.
By that, I mean it was beautiful. WHUDDUP.
I didn't want to raise my hopes for nothing, so I didn't expect fives on anything except Lit, and I thought I wouldn't pass Calc either, but I did! I passed it! I got fives on Art History and Government too, and a four on Econ. Oh yes, I got a five for Lit too, of course. Whee! I'm so excited! I was really afraid for calc, actually, cuz the multiple choice was really hard, and I messed up one of the free responses so badly that all I could do was write a bunch of math puns on it and hope for the best. But I guess the other ones were acceptable, or at least acceptable enough to let me pass. Maybe I can place out of some math classes in college now! Ya know, I was also really worried about Econ, actually, because although I really like it, I'm not great at it, and I didn't study for it, and there was a lot of foreign exchange stuff (which I'm really not great at) (ew ungrammatical). One of the free response questions was pretty weird, too. But there was a good number of questions about the various curves and graphs and shifters and whatnot, and I'm fabulous with those, so that saved me. Government and Art History seemed too easy to me; it seemed like I knew every single multiple choice question, and the FRQs weren't too hard either, so I thought I'd failed them (even though deep down in the bottom of my soul where I keep the things I don't want to admit, I was pretty sure I'd done really well). But, well-p, seems they really were easy. There weren't any unusual court cases on the Government exam, I mean, I knew all of them, and I might know a lot of court cases, but I don't know the half of it, you see what I mean? There was also a lot of stuff about the courts, and since that's what I want out of life (to be on the administering end, not the receiving end), I know that pretty well. But, you know, in general, I'm really pretty good at government. I like it, you see. And it's easy. I never studied, except a little bit on tour, and I hadn't had the class since first semester, and I still know the stuff. So there ya have it. Speaking of easy stuff, the Lit exam was extremely disappointing. I love taking tests in English, easy or not, but still, I feel like they could have stepped up their game. There was only one question about rhyme scheme, and only one about meter, and both were very conventional. I was hoping they would have some big blow-out extravaganza with spondees and anapests and forms which haven't been in common use since sixteenth-century France, but nope, they asked about terza rima or something (I can't remember precisely what it was). And the analysis was so shallow! The exercises we did in class were much more fun. There wasn't a single challenging question on there (maybe there was one), and it was almost as bad as the SAT. The free response was a bit better, since I got to do my own analysis, but the questions were exactly like the ones we'd had in class, maybe easier. I won't deny I had fun, though; I was actually sorry when the proctors called time. And, that was that. We were really well prepared, I think. I will fight anyone who dares dispute that AP Lit is the best and most awesome class that ever came across my path in this life of mine.
So. Three fives, a four, and a three. I won't deny that I would have done better if I'd studied (especially in Calc), but I think it's a job well done overall.
I should probably go take a shower. I have work in the morning, and I look like a goon. But my head hurts too much to move. Ugh. This is why it's the best of times and the worst of times. Perhaps taking a shower will help my head. Do you think that could be the case? It still seems like a bit too troublesome to be worth my very valuable time.
Ooh, I never expounded upon my new job! It's a job, it is. There's this community college in the next town over, and it's got more problems than the Republican party. Mom did a series of lectures there for awhile, but she stopped when they refused to pay her – and that's the least of their worries. But anyway, since they have so many problems, they are in constant need of teachers, and they were perfectly amenable to the idea of hiring me. I do get paid, fortunately (albeit rather sporadically), and even though I make more teaching violin, it's good money, and good experience to boot. I'm technically a tutor for one particularly lost ESL student, but my job title never bothered anyone. I help the other students in the class, act as the TA, and occasionally, even teach the class (which brings the grand total of teachers in the class up to three). It's interesting, though, and I'm wondering now if I could teach ESL in order to pay off my student loans. Well, okay, I'm pretty positive I could teach ESL. I'd do a better job than the teachers they have at the school, anyway. Our current "professor," a professional farmer whose son is the one and only secretary and whose level of English is only slightly higher than the students', never follows the lesson plan, and never teaches anything. The class is called Speaking and Listening, so one would assume something of that nature would be going on, right? Not at our school! The teacher has gotten rid of all the tapes, and asks the students to write simple sentences for the entire time, sentences which he never checks or asks them to read. And this might not seem so bad, but they're literally, "He is singing" and "I'm going to the store." This is stuff the students already know, you see, and he never gives them vocab words, or helps with grammar (which he spells "gramer") or anything. The curriculum isn't that bad; it has a lot of stuff the students don't know and should learn, but he doesn't pay attention to it beyond looking at the pictures and trying to teach them what they are. They know what the pictures are, thanks, they're grown men and women, not babies! On Wednesday, he tried to explain what a bank was (spectacularly unsuccessfully, may I add). As if this wasn't bad enough, he's unbelievably rude to the poor people. Whenever they say anything (which is rare), he "corrects" it to something that is either incorrect or trivially different, picks on their accents, and mocks them in general. He's always poking fun at them, in a very rude way, and he's incredibly racist. There's not much I can do, because I'm younger than everyone in the room by a good ten years, and it's not my job to interfere. What I'd like to do is teach the class myself, but that doesn't help my student much, and my responsibility is to her. Ugh, it's just so frustrating though! Now, they're starting up a summer program for kids who want to learn English, and they want me to take care of it, so I start that on Monday, or tomorrow, I guess. They're okay with Kitty helping, since taking care of sixty twelve-year-olds is one of my biggest nightmares, and she doesn't mind (literally, though, there are sixty-something kids signed up). I don't know how I'm going to deal with this. I need to find a good outfit. Something that will garner respect, and make them want to do what I tell them. No little girl dresses for me! Unfortunately, little girl dresses (and skirts and ballet flats and whatnot) constitute 95% of my wardrobe. Maybe I should go for the sexy secretary look. I can wear a pencil skirt and a blouse and heels (I'll have to borrow the heels from Kitty). I can put my hair in a bun, too. Oh yeah, babe. This is sartorial Sparta.
Ugh, now Dad has settled himself down on the couch and is holding forth on how much he is able to sweat, and indeed, how much he sweated today. I suppose it's very interesting and educational (to some, at least). Perhaps he could publish his findings in a book.
Well, no more stalling, now. It's time for me to go get clean. This is it, Jasmine. Time to get up. Let's go. Yup. Up, up. Clay lies still, but blood's a rover, breath's a ware that will not keep. Up lad, when the journey's over, there'll be time enough to sleep! Incidentally, I quote that poem to myself every day when I'm trying to get out of bed. Anyway! Up you go! Let's show a leg there! Come on! Hop to it! Vamoose! Maybe I will be an inspirational speaker someday.